Morgan's Missives

On The Road.....Again

2007-06-11T00:35:00.000-04:00

I remember, with fondness, watching On The Road with Charles Kuralt. I often felt as if that might be the perfect job to have, simply traveling around the country seeing places you hadn’t seen before and being able to wonder the back roads at whim. (Come to think of it, I guess that is why I enjoyed Steinbeck’s "Travels with Charley" so much.)

I still enjoy seeing things I haven’t seen before… That is one good thing about having to travel at times for my job. I have over twenty years worth of memories of places that I most likely wouldn’t have seen had it not been for the requirements of travel for the sake of work.

For the past four days I have been lucky in being in Sacramento, CA. I have been to California before, but never Sacramento. So far, I am impressed with what I have seen in my short stay here. Aside from all of the things right here you can do or see (such as Old Sacramento which I visited today) you are no more than a couple of hours drive time from many other very interesting places to visit…such as San Francisco for example but I’ve been there before.

SO… To do something new, I took the opportunity on Saturday to drive over to Reno which meant a very cool drive up through the Sierra Nevada Mountains. It had been a long time since I’d had the opportunity to be in the mountains, and even though they are not quite the Rocky Mountains, they were more than good enough. It was a very relaxing drive and I could feel the tension draining from my body as I drove along taking in the sights.

I didn’t stay long in Reno as I was actually focused on getting to Virginia City, Nevada to take in some of its historic sites. After spending an hour or so there and having a quick bite to eat, I headed on down to Carson City, Nevada (the capital of NV) and drove around there a little while, then headed back up into the mountains on US 50 towards Lake Tahoe. (Side Note: It was kind of cool pulling up to US 50 and knowing that if I turned left, instead of right, I could drive straight over to where I grew up in Illinois. Ok, it was cool to me…)

I’ve seen shots of Lake Tahoe, and heard a lot about it over the years, but nothing prepares you for when you head down into the basin and catch the first site of this large lake surrounded by mountain peaks. I’ve seen much beauty in my time, but this might top the list. I can only wonder how John C. Fremont and Kit Carson must have felt when they first set eyes upon the lake back in 1844. I only wish I could have seen it then, as it was before hotels, lodges, and casinos came into existence around the shores.

After leaving the Tahoe area, it was back to a very enjoyable drive through the mountains back into Sacramento.

Yes, I greatly enjoyed the experience, just as I enjoyed a good steak at Sacramento’s oldest steak house this evening while I was down in Old Sacramento. I enjoyed walking over to the river and enjoying the cool breeze while watching the sun dip down towards the horizon. But… At the same time, as with this entire trip, most of the time as I was seeing things I was thinking about how the wife, or the kids would have liked this or that, or wishing they were there to see it with me. It is still a rewarding experience to me, but one that is none the less diminished.

Soon I will be heading back home. I hope my trip back is easier than it was coming as just the travel time alone can be a killer. Our plane was almost two hours delayed leaving which caused me to miss my connecting flight in Minneapolis and be stuck there for almost five hours. Then I had to fly onto Portland and wait an hour there and then finally I was on my way to Sacramento. I’m ready to go home…

Stress

2007-05-22T23:50:00.000-04:00

One of the entries in the Merriam-Webster dictionary for the word stress reads as follows:

“a state resulting from a stress; especially : one of bodily or mental tension resulting from factors that tend to alter an existent equilibrium”

I love the “…alter an existent equilibrium…” part myself. Such a cool way of defining events in my life that just totally sucks.

Work has just been killing me lately with all of the various projects we have going on right at the moment and all the time I’ve had to spend out of the office dealing with client needs. I’m not only working with our Operations group on client issues, but I’m also trying to provide all of the companies internal needs as well. Let’s just say it isn’t working well. At least they are looking for another internal person so I can focus on the needs of the Operations group, but until that happens… Well… Current example… Here it is, going on midnight, and I’m still working on rebuilding a laptop here at home to replace a failed unit while also trying to fix a router problem for another client while also trying to spec out some other equipment we need. What ever happened to coming home and spending a quite evening watching T.V. or reading or just doing plain nothing but spending time with the family?

Then to add insult to injury, the engine on our primary car decided to blow up on Sunday. I’m at a soccer game with the 4 ½ year old when I get a cell call from the wife that the car had died. She was on the way to pick up the other two boys from their father when the car died. SO… I have to drive about thirty miles down to where she’s broke down in the other car, let her take it to go ahead down to pick them up, and try to see what I can do with dead car. Of course, she was running late getting to the meeting point, and couldn’t get the ex to answer the cell phone. She gets there… No one is there… Waits… Nothing… Finally she had to head back to pick me up so we could get the 4 ½ year old back home to his mom and while she’s on the way, I finally got ahold of the ex who tells me they forgot to bring the cell phone. SO… The other two boys had to stay an extra night with their dad… The next morning, I have to have the dead car towed to the shop…and then take the other car to get a tire replace (had a flat on it earlier in the week)…and then we had to go see about getting another car as I figured the engine was pretty much shot. Spent all day getting another car, then had to drive down to pick up the other two boys (all the way down this time) so we didn’t end up getting back home until about 11 p.m. Then get up this morning, put in a hectic day at the office, and got the call that yes indeed, the engine is going to have to be rebuilt or replaced in the dead car.

Will someone stop this ride please? I really want to get off… Stress indeed!!

Minute Maid Lemonade, a Cigarette, and Red Dawn

2007-05-09T21:48:00.000-04:00

Ok... Here I am sitting in a hotel room (a very nice suite, actually, but a hotel room none the less) drinking some Minute Maid Lemonade, smoking a cigarette, and watching Red Dawn on the T.V. in the “living room” part of the suite. Guess I could go watch it on the T.V. in the bedroom… Naw…

Needless to say, it’s pretty boring here in Nebraska. I’ve been spending quite a bit of time here over the past couple of months. We just happen to have multiple clients here in town, and two of the big ones are having problems, so I and others might end up having to file for residency if we aren’t careful.

Things have been busy… Life, work, travel, a little bit of this, a little bit of that…and all of the sudden I realize I haven’t posted in almost two months. Of course, that does seem to be a going trend these days. I keep thinking about it, posting that is, but something else always seems to come up and I never get around to it. So… As I was sitting here thinking about how good a bed sounds and about how tired I am right now, I thought I should take the opportunity I have and make a post. Here it is… Enjoy it… Or don’t… It’s all good.

I hope each of you is well… I’m trying to catch up on some of the back posts and, who knows, just maybe keep my own entries a little more current. Meanwhile, I’ll leave you with this warning: Watch out for low flying turkeys when you’re driving in Nebraska!!

Happy Birthday, Bill!!

2007-03-22T13:55:00.000-04:00

Ok… I have a few moments to spare before a conference call and I’m bored. So, I thought it would be a perfect time to catch up on a little blogging. However, it looks like most of us are about in the same state as I am…meaning there’s not a lot of fresh stuff out here at the moment.

So… I’m thinking, what can I write about in such a short period of time. And then it hit me… Today is March 22nd, which happens to be William Shatner’s birthday. So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

William Shatner (a.k.a. Captain James T. Kirk, T.J. Hooker, Walter H. Bascom, Denny Crane) was born on this day in 1931 in Montreal, Canada.

I’ve loved watching Bill for most of my life filling a variety of roles and greatly appreciate his famous “over the top” approach at times he brings to his roles. Also, if you have never taken the opportunity to read some of the books he has written, notably the Tekwar series as well as a few situated in the Star Trek universe, you might be missing something.

Anyway… Gotta run for now…

Beware the Ides of March...

2007-03-15T13:29:00.000-04:00

Well... Thanks to an old soothsayer's warning to Julius Caesar (according to Mr. Shakespeare & Mrs. Mitchell) the Ides of March were something to be worried about. And... Based upon my personal experience three years ago today, I'd agree.

I lost a car to flood waters down in Mexico. True, it wasn't a great loss since it was a rental, and a P.T. "Looser" to boot... But... It was an interesting experience.

This year the Ides of March has once again saw rain. At least so far today I've only had to dodge the normal idiots out driving around on the roads... No floods... No loss of vehicle...

Maybe something eventful will happen later...

You’re Free Mr. Humphries!

2007-03-08T13:09:00.000-05:00

Of all the older BBC sitcoms that I use to watch, and still do when I have the chance, my most favorite has to be “Are You Being Served.”

It was primarily set on a floor of Grace Brothers department store and had a women’s department on one side and a men’s department on the other. The situations were great, the banter witty, and the innuendo was quite inventive.

You had Mrs. Slocombe in charge of the women’s department frequently talking about her pussy (referring to her cat), along with Miss. Brahms. On the men’s side was Captain Peacock leading the way with Mr. Lucas and Mr. Humphries. Of course there were various other cast members playing various parts…

Of them all, Mr. Humphries was the most memorable. Played by John Inman, Mr. Humphries was very quick witted, very acerbic in his responses at time, and about as “limp-wristed” as one could imagine – but never actually claiming anything. But his high pitched, “I’m free…!” rang out often. Where all of the cast were excellent in their roles, somehow, Mr. Humphries seems to bring everything together in the group.

Sadly, I saw today where John Inman has passed away at the age of 71.

A fond farewell to you, Mr. Wilberforce Clayborne Humphries…

Politics + Technology = A Pain in My Rear

2007-03-07T12:33:00.000-05:00

I found only one advantage in migrating to the land of Hoosier-dome… We didn’t observe Daylight Savings Time. This was just perfect for me, as I am someone whose internal clock gets really out of whack for a good two to three weeks when all of the sudden time shifted around me. I always knew I was going to have sleeping problems when the time changed.

SO… Here I am, living the life of a stranger in a strange land, but it was all made worth while because I didn’t have to change my freaking clocks (and loose sleep)…until last year. That’s when the State Legislator’s finally decided it would be a good idea to bring Indiana into the 20th Century… {Side note: This state still has a LONG way to go to qualify for the 21st Century.} So, starting last April I once again had to suffer with the old “Spring Forward – Fall Back” crap.

It was bad enough having sleep problems… But as someone who works in the Technology sector, it was a double pain having to update all of the damn computers and various other electronic items that used time settings based upon a zone that never changed the time. Needless to say, even as recent as this past December I was still finding computers and other gear that was still set for the old Indiana time zone…hence one hour off.

Then comes 2007… The year when (thanks to our Congress back in 2005) it was decided that it would be a grand idea to expand the range of DST by adding three weeks to the front, and one week to the rear. So… Once again… I’m back to having to do all sorts of extra work to patch things to account for the new range of dates. Needless to say… I’m not a very happy camper at the moment.

I can only hope that somehow every single politician who voted for this pox upon technologists will find themselves missing every critical appointment they have because their calendars will all be off. Of course… What’s a golf game here, or a fund raising dinner there… If nothing else… Maybe they’ll find themselves in a Causality Loop that will keep them running around in circles where at least they can’t do the rest of us any harm.

Oh well… Guess I’ll get back to applying updates…

The Best Intentions...

2007-03-01T11:15:00.000-05:00

Well… I had great intentions towards the middle of February of once again returning to the world of the Blog on a regular basis. However, as I have heard, “…the road to hell is paved with good intentions…” Maybe I need to get off the road for awhile and trudge through the woods!

Since taking my new position in January, I’ve been just a little on the busy side of things to say the very least. Where on one hand I truly enjoy this as it keeps me engaged on a daily basis, it also has the effect of leaving me pretty worn out by the end of the day. So when I do manage to drag myself home to spend some time with the family, I find that I really am not in a mind set to do much of anything else that requires me to actually think.

I’m still hoping, however, to get back to being more involved here both in writing in my own Blog, while also keeping up with and responding to others. The simple fact of the matter is that I miss the interaction. My “intention” for this weekend will be to actually write something with some meaning… I know there are several things going on in the world that I’ve been thinking about, so maybe I’ll pick a subject and write about it. I also know that I have the in-laws coming up on Sunday… That could produce interesting fodder for a Blog entry. Hummmmmm….

What A Cool Day

2007-02-13T14:38:00.000-05:00

First of all… I’m still here. I appreciate those of you who wondered and asked. I hadn’t exactly intended on giving up my on-line life, but I’ve been a bit on the busy side since the first of the year, and something had to give. Guess what it was…

Anyway… A short recap of the past month and a half… I lost my job at the start of the year due to a layoff, which wasn’t a big surprise as my old company is having some financial challenges. You would think this would be a bad thing… It wasn’t… I was actually quite happy to lose the position. It gave me some extra time at home to spend with the family (the kids were still out of school) and to relax a little bit. I knew I had money coming in through the middle of this month, so no worries. Besides, I was off for two weeks and then went back to work as a Network Engineer with another company with better benefits, and a much better salary. So… Life is good.

Today, I’m working from home as our office is closed due to the winter weather in the area. I just got back a little while ago from taking the wife to work and all I can say is, the conditions are brutal out there at the moment. It’s not the worse I’ve ever experienced, but it’s more than enough to keep sane people at home.

However, I’M LOVING THE WEATHER!!!! I like winter… I’ve been ticked off all season since we only really first got a decent snow (six inches) just last week. Now with what we are getting today, I’m happy. I feel like we’ve had a winter now. It reminds me of living out in Colorado, of which, and by the way, the wife has decided she would have liked if it was like it is today.

Here’s hoping the rest of you in the region are safe and warm today. I’ll try, as I can, to catch up on some over due reading. And maybe I’ll be able to keep a little more current on things than I have for the past six weeks.

In With The New...

2006-12-31T23:52:00.000-05:00

It is the twilight of 2006... A new year is only a few short minutes away… As is normal with life -- with time -- change is a constant. This year has been no different for me, for you, or for the world in general.

It is a given that each year events will unfold… Some will be good, some will be bad, some will simply occur leaving us neither better or worse off than we were had it never happened.

This year has seen, from my own perspective, more change in my life than might be considered usual. It has not been as dramatic as some years, but it will last in my mind as more memorable than many of years past. Again… Some for the good, some for the not so good…

I am ready for the new year to begin and I hope it is one that sees more of the good than of the bad.

My best wishes to you all… Happy New Year… May it be a good one…

Observations…

2006-12-26T07:52:00.000-05:00

I couldn’t help but notice over the past few days some of the following that is going on in the world:

James Brown died: “I’m going away…” were his last reported words…
The death toll in Iraq has exceeded the 9/11 casualty total…
Once again, the people of Somalia are suffering but the Islamic forces are being driven back…
Hamas is still causing strife in the Middle East…
American forces take down a top Taliban leader in Afghanistan…
An oil pipeline exploded in Nigeria: 200 dead…
Pakistan is building a fence, complete with mines, on part of its border with Afghanistan…
Yet another car bomb attack in Baghdad… 23 killed, 105 wounded…

…and the 21st century continues.

The Christmas Story

2006-12-22T09:58:00.000-05:00

Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child of the Holy Spirit; and her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.

But as he considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, "Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit; she will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins."

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: "Behold, a virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and his name shall be called Emmanuel" (which means, God with us).
When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took his wife, but knew her not until she had borne a son; and he called his name Jesus.

Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, saying, "Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we have seen his star in the East, and have come to worship him."

When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him; and assembling all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born.

They told him, "In Bethlehem of Judea; for so it is written by the prophet: 'And you, O Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; for from you shall come a ruler who will govern my people Israel.'"

Then Herod summoned the wise men secretly and ascertained from them what time the star appeared; and he sent them to Bethlehem, saying, "Go and search diligently for the child, and when you have found him bring me word, that I too may come and worship him."

When they had heard the king they went their way; and lo, the star which they had seen in the East went before them, till it came to rest over the place where the child was.

When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedingly with great joy; and going into the house they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshiped him.

Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts, gold and frankincense and myrrh. And being warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they departed to their own country by another way.

Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, "Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there till I tell you; for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him."

And he rose and took the child and his mother by night, and departed to Egypt, and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, "Out of Egypt have I called my son."

Then Herod, when he saw that he had been tricked by the wise men, was in a furious rage, and he sent and killed all the male children in Bethlehem and in all that region who were two years old or under, according to the time which he had ascertained from the wise men.

Then was fulfilled what was spoken by the prophet Jeremiah: "A voice was heard in Ramah, wailing and loud lamentation, Rachel weeping for her children; she refused to be consoled, because they were no more."

But when Herod died, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt, saying, "Rise, take the child and his mother, and go to the land of Israel, for those who sought the child's life are dead."

And he rose and took the child and his mother, and went to the land of Israel. But when he heard that Archelaus reigned over Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go there, and being warned in a dream he withdrew to the district of Galilee.And he went and dwelt in a city called Nazareth, that what was spoken by the prophets might be fulfilled, "He shall be called a Nazarene."

Wishing It Were A Winter Wonderland

2006-12-20T13:40:00.000-05:00

It is days like today that make me regret ever moving back to the mid-west from Colorado. I have been reading, with great envy, about the snow storm currently piling all of that lovely white snow, now measuring in feet in various parts of the state. (NOTE: The PIC is from a web cam very close to where I used to live in Denver.)

I was just having a conversation about snow, or rather the lack of it, here in Indiana last night and we both agreed that it would be nice to have a white Christmas. Well, if we were living out west we’d be having one.

I have fond memories of several of the snow storms I went through while living in Colorado. They were fantastic! Not quite what we had here in the mid-west back during the Blizzard of ’78, but good enough. I even went through one “thunder snow” storm while living in Denver. The lightening was red and purple…

Four years ago, here, on Christmas Eve we had a very nice storm come through which left 9 to 13” in various parts of the area. That was a great Christmas morning…

Alas, according to the forecast for next week, we won’t be having a White Christmas here. So… Enjoy all of you denizens of the Great Plains! Maybe next year…

And to All! A very Merry Christmas! …and a Happy New Year!!

Tis’ The Season…Of The Herd

2006-12-13T12:34:00.000-05:00

Of the many ways to enjoy and celebrate the “holiday” season which stretches between Thanksgiving and New Years, shopping to me has become the antithesis of Joy & Good-will.

Maybe it is due to one very simple fact… I have a great dislike for people. Not to say that I am not quite fond of some individuals, for I am… But people… That collective of wasted DNA which so often provides the ultimate display of utter ignorance… I really can’t stand to be around them, let alone find myself within their midst.

However, since I do not have a mass stockpile of the basic items required these days for human existence, I find that I must venture forth from my sanctum sanctorum on occasion during this time of the year, even knowing that I will have to face my great nemesis; again…and again…and yet…again.

My most recent foray into the realm of the objectionable was last night. On my way home from work, I had the need to visit the local Meijer store (i.e. Super Wal-mart type store) for a few items. I knew that it was not going to be a pleasant experience even before I had managed to creep along the parking lot to a place to park the car. Already, the people, here forth noted as, “The Herd,” were wandering back and forth with all the rush of a herd of turtles crawling through a dust storm.

Once inside the store, my situation did not improve… I had been encumbered by The Herd while still in the parking lot, but once they found themselves within the confines of the store, they became paralyzing. I simply had to stand for awhile watching as The Herd, with glassy eyes, attempted to figure out which way they should lumber off to in search of whatever it was they were searching for. Given the slack jawed, glazed eyed, befuddled appearance on some of the faces I saw, I would surmise that many were there simply to be there without any true notion of what they were seeking, or even if it could be found within the store.

As I finally managed to make my way through towards the back of the store where I needed to start my shopping, I had many occasion to pause and observe the same look, the same response, the same pattern, that The Herd shared wherever they were encountered.

To make a long story shorter… I finally, and I might add without turning any of The Herd into jerky, managed to get everything I wanted and made my way to the check out lines. If you think that things couldn’t have gotten any worse, you would be mistaken. Out of almost 30 check out lines, there was a grand total of 4 open for business. (I discount the check it yourself lines as I had too many items, and they had already been swarmed en mass by The Herd.)

I watched for 25 minutes as the cashier (undoubtedly culled from The Herd) slowly, oh, EVER so slowly checked each and every item before passing it over the scanner… She displayed all of the speed of frozen ambergris as she went about the performance of her duties. Once she finally started checking my items, she haphazardly dropped the items into plastic bags, not even once looking to see where the items were going. On the second bag, as she released a box of angle hair pasta, the corner of the box hit the side of the bag on the way down, causing a rip in the bag. Of course, the box continued its path through the rip; followed by the second box of pasta, and seven other items. Again, all of this was missed by this Herd reject as she continued along her mundane way. She didn’t even pause to observe, let alone question or assist me, as I picked up all the items and placed them into a new bag.

Finally… Finally it was OVER! I paid!! I started my escape… Only to hear her say, “Have a good evening…” I didn’t bother to stop and try to explain to her why I KNEW I was going to have a good evening… After all, my torture was over… Rest and deliverance was at hand… I was leaving The Herd in my wake and returning again to the peace and tranquility of my abode.

Auld Lang Syne...

2006-12-11T13:50:00.000-05:00

Aside from the fact that the song Auld Lang Syne is so well known in the world, there is something about the melody that sings within in my blood. Maybe it has to do with the origins of the song and some imprinted memory hidden deep in my blood, but whatever it is, I can not help but start thinking about things ‘…old long since.’

I am once again listening to Christmas songs via web radio, and this tune started playing. I found myself immediately thinking about various memories I have from around this time of the year:

I’m not sure how old I was, but I remember going out with Dad to cut down a Christmas tree one year. It was cold, and there was snow. We went out east and south of where my grandparents lived (on my mother’s side) and found a small cedar tree. I know both my grandparents were still alive at the time, so I had to be somewhere between 3-5 years old. Of course, this was also before we found out I had allergies, so there went real Christmas trees…

I remember another year when I accidentally set fire to a Christmas decoration in the east room of the old house. It was something Mom had put together with cotton to represent the snow. There were candles… I knocked one over… Poof! I remember Dad putting it all out with a bottle (still 16oz glass at the time) of Coke. I think I was 5 or 6 at the time.

I remember one year going out for a drive with Dad on Christmas Eve and when we got back home, I found out that Santa had come early that year!! Of course, later in life, I found out that Mom and Dad had done that because they knew a large snow storm was encroaching upon the area, and Dad worked for the Illinois Department of Transportation, so he knew he was going to have to leave later in the night and be working on Christmas…

…But that started a bit of a tradition for our family as we started having Christmas on Christmas Eve from then on out. Most of the time Aunt Zelda (my mother’s sister) and Uncle Marvin came in to celebrate with us. As my grandparents were all gone so early in my life, they ended up being more like my grandparents than just an Aunt and Uncle.

In 1977, about a couple of weeks before Christmas, I ended up just about taking off the middle finger on my left hand while out knocking wood loose on the wood pile. We had an ice storm, so the wood was all froze together. I had went out with mom and was tapping it loose with a sledge hammer, when I somehow managed to get my finger down over the edge of the wood and hit it with the hammer. I was OK until I got up on the porch and took my glove off and saw all the red. We tried soaking it in cold water for a little while, as I was watching "Frosty The Snowman" on T.V., but Dad realized very quickly that we were going to have to head over to the hospital… Which was almost a thirty mile drive… On icy roads… And I really didn’t like the idea of stitches. But, that is what had to happen. I remember the doctor saying how lucky I was that the damage hadn’t gone just a couple of mille-meters more or I’d be missing most of my middle finger.

Another year, I can remember walking around town with Dad looking at all of the flood water after heavy rains had hit the area. I had a short sleeve shirt on since it was in the low 70's!!! For the mid-west, that is just SO wrong on Christmas day!

I remember Christmas Eve of 1988. It hadn’t been a very good year… I really wasn’t looking forward to the holidays. That morning, I happened to stop by the local tavern and run into one of my cousins. Well… We started out having just a couple of beers, but ended up spending most of the rest of the day bar hopping. Needless to say, by the time the evening rolled around I was seeing the vapor trails off of Santa’s sleigh. I still hear about that one from time to time… Not something I’m exactly proud of either…

Christmas of 1989… I was living in Denver. I had an apartment by myself that was small, but decent. I couldn’t afford a trip back home that year, so I ended up having a simple dinner with an Uncle (on my Dad’s side) who lived there as well. I had a very small tree that came with lights set up on one of my stereo speakers and had set up some Christmas cards for my holiday decorations. All in all… It was one of the hardest Christmas times I’ve had.

Maybe the hardest Christmas was in 1995… I had gone through a divorce, and my ex had fallen off the face of the planet with our daughter. I didn’t have the money at the time to hire a lawyer to pursue legal options. I didn’t have enough money to come home to try to be with anyone. And even though I had some offer from friends to spend time with them during the holidays, I just couldn’t bring myself to go anywhere. And… It was also just three months after my Dad had passed away… I got up Christmas morning and listened to the "Christmas Story" on the Charlton Heston Presents the Bible CD. Later in the day, I’m sitting there flipping through T.V. and I come across "The Music Man" on one of the channels. That was just about my Dad’s favorite musical (and one that I like very well) and it was at that moment that pretty much all of the events of the year hit me like a ton of bricks…

Christmas of 2002 saw over 10” of snow of the ground from a storm that had passed through the night before. It was a good Christmas day, and just two days later, the best Christmas present ever came along… My son… And he has continued to make Christmas a joy.

And this year, I think Christmas will add additional great memories as well with a blending of the old and the new, forming a new Beginning of sorts full of wonder and excitement with all the possibilities of the future in place.

Tis' The Season Of Solstice

2006-12-08T14:37:00.000-05:00

I am of the opinion that the “winter doldrums” may have arrived early for me this year. Of late my mind is sluggish, I am prone to not feeling like doing much, and I feel as if I could use a good 18 hours of sleep. Of course, it could also be that I’m still trying to rid myself of whatever little nasty bug I ended up picking up a week ago.

I keep thinking that I would like to come up with something meaningful to blog about – like a post I was contemplating yesterday to mark the 65th anniversary of the bombing of Pearl Harbor, and yet, as I was getting ready to type, my mind refused to cooperate, so I ended up posting nothing.

Maybe I just need a vacation… It has been almost two and a half years since I last took a real vacation, and I’ll admit to being more than a bit burnt out with work. So, some time off doing something enjoyable might be in order. However, with Christmas fast approaching, and still getting over the recent move, and everything else, I tend to think it will be awhile before that might occur. Maybe during the Spring Break…

At least my most favorite day of the year is fast approaching, that being the Winter Solstice, which will officially occur on December 21 this year at 7:22 p.m. EST. There are a couple of Winter Solstice events in and around the area that I’m aware of this year which might be interesting to observe. It’s always fun hanging out with the Pagan’s.

The Joy of Web Radio

2006-12-05T13:07:00.000-05:00

There is one thing I really enjoy about web based technology... The ability to find just about anything you would want to list to any time you want to -- on demand.

Take for instance today. I'm still feeling wasted with whatever it is that has been going around and finally settled in our household. So in order to try and brighten my mood a little and lift my depleated spirit, I decided to log into laucnch.yahoo.com and listen to a little Christmas music.

There are several different "stations" to choose from, including a "Scrooge Toons" selection. For myself, I always prefer Traditional. So, I will sit here and listen to Bing, and Frank, and Doc and try to be reposed for awhile...even while listening to Tony Bennett

Tired And Feeling It...

2006-12-01T14:00:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't been posting in almost two weeks and I thought I'd take the opportunity today to do something about it but now that I'm here I find myself too tired of mind to really try and blog about anything useful so I guess I'll simply leave things about the way they are for now in the hopes that sometime in the next couple of days I'll feel more like saying something.

The Joys of Moving...

2006-11-20T22:04:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure how many times I've actually moved from place to place over the past 22 years. I actually used to keep count, but somewhere over the course of time, I sort of lost count. I'm sure I could...or at least I think I could...sit down and count them all up again, but when I actually start thinking about it, then I'm not so sure I want to know for sure.

All I know is that I've moved once again... This weekend... To a large apartment on the second (top) level of the building... (I hate hearing anyone walking above me.) That means up and down the stairs... 26' U-Haul truck... Packing, unpacking... Pain in my back, shoulders, arms, knuckles, hips, knees, ankles...even my toes. I think about the only thing not hurting on my body at present is my hair.

I ended up taking the day off of work (well, mostly as I’ve been doing remote work) trying to recover from the weekend. Recover at least physically. There is still a lot of stuff to finish putting away, or getting rid of, until we’ll really have our home situated the way we like it.

I’m tired of moving… I see one more in the future, maybe a couple of years (or less) from now, but I’m already going to start putting money away because the next time I’m going hire movers and let them suffer the ill effects of all the heavy lifting and the stairs. I’ve had it… There are still a couple of friends I’ll help move, but for myself… No more… Been there, done that, have the walker to prove it!!

But for now… I and Mormon Girl can start to rest knowing that the move is over, we’re here, and we don’t have to worry about it for awhile. And, if it hadn’t been for the help of O.Y.G., we never would have made it through the weekend.

So… If you will excuse me, I will say so long for now as I have a date with a bottle of Tylenol.

Business Trips…And Memories

2006-11-16T22:03:00.000-05:00

I’m currently sitting in a hotel room in Henderson, Kentucky. It’s just a quick, overnight business trip. Nothing exciting, nothing special, just a night sleeping by myself, which I’m not accustom to doing since getting re-married. At least I have a king sized bed with four…count them, FOUR…pillows to sleep with, so all is not lost.

The last time I spent the night in Henderson was back in early 2001. A good friend of mine from Colorado was down here on a business trip of her own and I came down to spend some time with her. After I got here and we had dinner, she was telling me of all the problems that she was having with her husband (also a good friend of mine). We ended up sleeping that night in her room as she didn’t feel like being alone… It was all totally platonic… I wouldn’t have had it any other way, and I don’t think she would have either. Sadly to say, it wasn’t but a couple of weeks after she returned to Colorado that I got the call they had separated and filed for divorce.

It’s funny what you start thinking about when you’re on the road all by yourself. I can’t help but wonder what a friend of mine from St. Louis was thinking when he was on a business trip one time and decided to commit suicide in his hotel room. I can’t help but wonder how some of the people I’ve known in the past, thanks to business trips, are doing right now. I can’t help but think about some of the fun I’ve had taking business trips, along with some of the not so good times that have happened while on these trips.

I do know this… I am very glad that I haven’t had to spend my life, my career, living out of hotel rooms. I don’t care how fancy of a hotel you are staying in, or how good their dining room might be, or how comfortable the bed… In the end you are stuck in small little room… And it gets really old, really quick… I found that out one time when I was on a month long business trip in Massachusetts. But that is several other stories…

Just Say NO…to Talking Jesus Dolls

2006-11-14T14:25:00.000-05:00

I need to stop reading or hearing the news. Anymore, most of it just depresses me. Here’s a good one out of Los Angeles…

The Marine “Toys For Tots” program has rejected the donation of 4,000 talking Jesus dolls by a company that specializes in Biblical figures. The rational was that they “…can’t take a chance on sending a talking Jesus doll to a Jewish family or a Muslim family…”

Ok… Let’s see if we have this straight… According to the Marines Toys For Tots Foundation web page, the Foundation “…provides Marines the opportunity to bring the joy of Christmas to needy children and accomplish passive mentoring by serving as positive role models.”

Maybe I don’t understand the definition of Christmas… Let me look it up… Hang on… Entering in the Meriam-Webster URL… Referencing Christmas… OH… It’s a noun… OK… Here it is…

The definition: “A Christian feast on December 25 or among some Eastern Orthodox Christians on January 7 that commemorates the birth of Christ and is usually observed as a legal holiday.”

So… If I understand the philosophy here… The Toys For Tots program is saying that it is inappropriate to hand out a toy doll made up as Jesus during a holiday season (Christmas) that commemorates His (Jesus) birth because it might be inappropriate, even though their program is designed to “…bring the joy of Christmas to needy children…” but somehow by sending out a Jesus doll during the commemoration period for Him (Christmas) it would be wrong…

Ok, boys and girls, I’m about to have a WTF moment here… Guess it’s time to stop thinking about the absurdity of this particular mind set before I stroke out.

I guess before I go, I need to ask: When in the bloody hell did this country, founded upon Christian principles, make such a wrong turn into ludicrousness?

What A Touching Story…NOT!

2006-11-14T14:10:00.000-05:00

I was at the hospital this last weekend and I caught a glimpse of a news story on the Fox network. I wasn’t happy with the little bit I gleaned while trying to follow a conversation and choke down some dry turkey.

Now today…I see the story on the Internet news. It’s titled, “Boy, 7, asks Mexico to help stop mom’s deportation.”

I’m sure you can guess the story… A woman who came to the United States from Mexico ILLEGALLY gave birth to a son on American soil which automatically made him a citizen and now this tiny, four foot nothing American child is pleading with the media and pleading with the authorities and pleading with the Mexican government to help his poor mom to continue to stay in the United States…a country in which she has violated our laws, ignored our sovereignty, and is thumbing her nose at our Republic!!!

The picture was taken to evoke sympathy… The story, about this little AMERICAN boy, was written to evoke compassion… And should somehow the United States screw up at this point and not kick his mothers sorry ass out of the country, another THREE MILLION children just like little Saul with THREE MILLION to possibly SIX MILLION law breaking parents might end up permitted to continue to reside in our country too; where we’re paying for their medical care, paying for their schooling, and paying for their food, shelter, and clothing in a lot of cases.

And what are the parents doing for this country, besides draining our tax dollars? Why, they are working illegally, taking money out of our economy, and funneling it back down to Mexico to help the rest of their family while at the same time refusing to blend into our society, or adopt the benefits accorded to all LEGAL residents of the United States and trying to contribute to the greater good.

Sorry, Saul… There is a little flaw in our Constitution that has been perverted into allowing you the status of being an American citizen. (I personally think it needs be amended to NOT allow that status to a child born to someone in the country illegally.) However, there is no question about the status of your mother. She goes!

My children, legal citizens of the United States, born to parents who were legal citizens, born to parents who were legal citizens, and so forth back to the middle 1700’s need to be the primary concern of our Government with regards to health, education, and employment. If your mother wants to leave, apply for citizenship, and pay her dues…then come to this country to adopt our values, our culture, our LANGUAGE…GREAT! Welcome home! If not… ¡Hasta luego!

It’s nothing personal… I like Mexico… I like Her people… I wish you well… But my family and the family of every freaking legal citizen in this country come before your mother. Why? Because this is OUR country… It is OUR home… And by damn, WE THE PEOPLE OF THE UNITED STATES, come first. End of story…

President Rudy Giuliani

2006-11-13T18:06:00.000-05:00

I just noticed that the former mayor of New York has taken the first steps in making a bid for the 2008 Presidential Election.

I hope he is successful. Not only is Rudy Giuliani a well known figure through out the world, he is also a moderate Republican and should be able to reach out to a wide array of American voters. Where I personally as a conservative centrist do not agree with all of his positions, I none the less would be willing to trust the man to lead the greatest country in the world as I think that over all, his policies would be sound.

So... Good luck Mr. Future President of the United States of America!!!

Assimilation Complete

2006-11-13T15:01:00.000-05:00

Well, I finally pulled the trigger and converted to the “new and improved” Blogger Beta. Not sure what I think so far since I haven’t really had the time to look around. Maybe I’ll do that tomorrow night while I’m sitting in a hotel room down in Kentucky.

But… For what it isn’t worth… Here’s my first Improved Post! Woo Hoo!

Here’s To Bionics

2006-11-06T13:48:00.000-05:00

My Step-father went into surgery early this morning to receive a couple of implants; A defibrillator and pacemaker. He has had heart problems for awhile (underwent emergency open heart surgery about two years ago) and the condition has finally gotten to a point where in order to have an improved quality of life, it was determined the assistance of technology was required.

My Mother called a little while ago and said that everything went very well, aside from taking a little longer than was expected to complete the surgery. He is now recovering, is expected to be in the hospital over night, and then will be sent home to rest and take it easy for the next six weeks while the implants take hold.

This isn’t exactly the stuff that made The Six Million Dollar Man a legend, but it is still a prime example of how today’s usage of technology is so vital and important to our health and well being.

Where he may not be leaping sixty feet into the air, or running along at 60 miles and hour, or fighting Big Foot, he is expected to end up with more mobility and energy.

At least… That’s what we are hoping for…

The Joy of Little Ones...

2006-11-01T10:49:00.000-05:00

It’s fun having a small child. Having the opportunity to view all of the wonders of the world through their eyes sometimes reminds us of what we have lost by transitioning into adulthood.

Last night was a good example of such a time… My son, who will turn four late in December, went out to “Trick or Treat” last night. When I arrived at his house, he was already dressed up as a black cat complete with a chain leash wrapped around him. (He was supposed to be the familiar to his older sisters Witch.)

He exhibited all of the exuberance of youth in his quest to collect more candy in a couple of hours than the country of Switzerland produces in a year. The excitement of his costume, of Halloween, of seeing all the decorations and other children dressed up was very apparent in all of his actions.

Setting out for the evening, he ran, he jumped, and he knocked on doors yelling “Trick or Treat”, collected his candy, said his thank you, and ran to catch up with the older children, already on their way to the next house.

But as the evening wore on, his steps slowed, his enthusiasm waned, and the bucket on his arm (already carrying an impressing haul) started to dangle. Soon, he was begging to be carried and passing his bucket off to anyone who would assume the burden. And eventually, instead of showing exhilaration at the prospect of receiving free treats, he started to feel apathy at having to visit yet another house, and eventually, dread. But once the evening was over, and he was back home looking through all of the different candies he had collected, his excitement about the evening returned and he appeared to be content with his efforts and their desired results. The anxiety was lost in a moment as he realized his journey complete.

Later in the evening, after I had returned to my apartment, I was standing outside in the chill night air smoking a cigarette while observing Orion rise above the horizon. I started to reflect upon the evening and I found myself impressed at how my son had shown me a full cycle of a life experience in less than a couple of hours. I saw how a lot of our adult life is spent, sometime in weeks, sometime in months, sometime in years, starting a journey, being excited about the prospect, sometimes feeling overwhelmed as we go along, and most of the times feeling relieved once it is over.

Yet, we can then look back with a certain amount of satisfaction on what has been, knowing that the trip was worthwhile, and wondering when the next journey will begin.

Hail Samhuinn

2006-10-31T14:39:00.000-05:00

Once again the old blood of my Scottish ancestors, still coursing through my veins, sings out in tune with my favorite time of the year…Samhuinn...the beginning of the dark season.

And much as I did as a child, I long to go forth into the world and create a little mischief and mayhem just to keep the old traditions going, and finish by building a large bonefire to burn a sacrifice of grain (grain alcohol that is) upon, and reflect upon life. And should, indeed, the barriers between realms thin and blur and I should find myself learning something about my past, or present, or future…so much the better; knowledge is always welcome and useful.

In Mexico, this time of the year is call Dia de los Muertos, meaning, Days of the Dead. (Some add a more plural meaning to the term.) Many flowers are sold, much food is prepared, and every necropolis is full of people spending time with those who have gone on before, sharing food, and drink, and laughter, and reflection. I was able to be in Mexico about four years ago during this time and be included in this celebration by some friends of mine down there. It was magical and spiritual and I can only think this must have been how the ancients celebrated almost 2000 years ago.

So enjoy! Be merry! Create a little chaos… And ponder that which is on your mind…

Could You Pass The US Citizenship Test?

2006-10-18T19:22:00.000-04:00

You Passed the US Citizenship Test

Congratulations - you got 10 out of 10 correct!

Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

My Celtic Horoscope

2006-10-18T15:20:00.000-04:00

You Are An Ash Tree

You are vivacious and impulsive, which makes you extremely attractive to many.
Intelligent and demanding, you don't care much for criticism.
You have a ton of ambition and talent, and sometimes money rules your heart.
You like to play with fate, and you can be very egotistical and restless.
Demanding of attention, you need love and a lot of emotional support.

What's Your Celtic Horoscope?

No Tag At Recess

2006-10-18T12:03:00.000-04:00

OK... I'm really starting to think that I was either born in the wrong country, or maybe I was just born in the wrong century. I can't help but notice periodically the asinine changes in our society that take place, often due to liberal minded (i.e. Politically Correct) stupidity, or sometimes just because of how litigation happy this country has become.

My most recent observation comes from a news story out of Massachusetts with the tag line: Not it! Mass. Elementary school bans tag

It seems, according to the school principal, that recess is “…a time when accidents can happen.” So, in order to help keep the kids from getting hurt, and also to minimize any liability the school might have, the school has now banned tag, touch football, or any other unauthorized game where kids might run and hurt themselves.

WHAT!?!?!?!? Is this freaking America, or did I step into a damn George Orwell novel? Let’s see… It’s a simple fact that our children are fatter (yeah, F-A-T-T-E-R… As in porky, tubby, chubby, chunky, obese, [insert your favorite non-politically correct synonym for lard-ass here]) than they used to be due to poor eating and exercise habits, yet we’re going to limit their physical activity on the playground by banning time honored traditional play because, um, someone might get hurt??? and then some so called parent might sue??? OK then… Please let me off at the next alternate reality…

To be fair to this particular school, according the article, they aren’t the only system doing this, nor do they carry the distinction of being the first. But there is just something SO WRONG with this entire picture that should have every average American doing a double take. When schools started banning dodge ball because it could be dangerous getting hit with a flying object, most people could sort of understand the reasoning. (However, I maintain it should still be permitted if it was on a voluntary basis. ) But telling a kid that you can't play tag because you might hurt yourself while running around?? That has to be one of the most ludicrous things I’ve heard so far this year…if not the most.

I, as a parent, am sick of our schools, and our governments, trying to tell me how my child should grow-up and what is or isn’t best for them. I’m totally sick and tired of these lame excuses for parents I too often see who won’t take the time or the responsibility to raise their own children and therefore lend credence to the continued abuse of these entities as they strive to assume more and more control that simply should, no, SIMPLY MUST be exclusively reserved for the parents…or at least for the parents who take their responsibilities seriously and actually have the desire to parent their child(ren).

Do you like the school telling your children: That God has no place in the classroom? That having pre-marital sex is OK as long as you use protection? That homosexual lifestyles are perfectly normal and whatever your religious belief on the subject might be is wrong if it states otherwise? That it is more important that you feel good about yourself than actually being able to learn the material being taught and pass a test on the subject? That we should accept everyone and what they believe in and stand for? That you can’t defend yourself if you’re getting the crap beat out of you without getting kicked out of school too because of a “Zero Tolerance” policy? That only liberal thinking is good and conservative thinking is bad? Anyone care to add to the list?

I guess maybe I really am living in an Orwellian society after all, and if so, this is one Snowball that has no intentions of being easy meat.

I just hope enough sane, rational people are left out there who notice things like this and will refuse to be silent about the stupidity of it all. Scream out and be heard… Refuse to be cajoled into accepting this path towards Socialism… Use the greatest gift you have in being an American: The right to be an Individual with a Voice…

DISCLAIMER: As a fat-ass myself, I am fully qualified to use objectionable terms when referencing someone else’s state of being a fat-ass. If anyone reading this post was offended by my diction........GOOD!

Buffy Meets Nickelback

2006-10-18T10:10:00.000-04:00

If any of you happen to be fans of the T.V. series "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" and also happen to like music by Nickelback, then check out the video adaptation of encounters between Buffy and Spike set to the tune of Figured You Out.

Why I (Mostly) Like The Fall

2006-10-17T11:24:00.000-04:00

Having lived the first part of my life in the mid-west, I became very accustom to there being actual changes in the seasons. Spring gave way to summer, summer to fall, fall to winter, and winter to spring. And, there are aspects about all of the seasons I like and dislike. For instances, I love snow…

However, I always looked forward to the fall. The cooler days and nights (especially good for sitting around a fire pit), the changes in the leaves, the smell of burning leaves, the fields being emptied of their fruits, going to the orchards for apples, the beginning of squirrel and dove hunting seasons… It was great!

I still like the fall, for most of the same reasons. These days I mostly enjoy the cooler weather, and a good change in color of the foliage. Where I don’t get out as much as I used to just to tromp around in the woods, I still like getting out and taking a walk and just seeing all of the changes. This is what I missed most about living out west where the seasons did not have such a marked difference. (And if you’ve seen one Aspen change to a different shade of gold, you’ve seen them all.)

I guess a few things about the fall I don’t enjoy is the extra dust coming out of the fields, and the allergy aggravating foliage that comes out right before the frosts and freezes kill them, and the turbulent weather that wreaks havoc on my sinuses – which has been going on for about a week now.

But still… It’s fall… And I’ve been to the orchard, and I’ve been able to get out and take some walks, and enjoy the cooler weather and the changing color of the leaves. And sinuses be damned, I’m still glad to be here to enjoy it all.

Curious Goods

2006-10-13T12:44:00.000-04:00

Friday the 13th (of any month) has to be one of my favorite days of the entire year. Along with the fact the I personally always purchase a lottery ticket, it always reminds me of one of my most favorite television programs - Friday the 13th: The Series.

Basically, if you don’t remember the show, two cousins take over their now dead uncles antique shop (Curious Goods) and, with the help of their uncles partner, Jack, try to recover all of the cursed items that he sold to people over the years.

This program had some really good cursed item concepts, some really great stories, and pretty darn good acting for television. Oh, for the record, and contrary to popular belief, the fact that Micki was a hot red head had absolutely nothing to do with my watching the show!

Some Enchanted Evening

2006-10-10T20:21:00.000-04:00

If you have never had the pleasure of attending a dinner theater, I highly recommend that you take the opportunity if and when it becomes available.

I, and a very special companion, had the opportunity to enjoy a delightful evening last Saturday at the Beef & Boards Dinner Theatre in Indianapolis. Aside from the excellent meal and the general atmosphere, we were regaled with an excellent performance of the Rodgers & Hammerstien musical, South Pacific.

Being one of my all time favorite musicals, it also held the special distinction of being something special that my companion and I shared from many years ago, and I can only surmise that this particular musical being performed at this time and place must fall within the purview of serendipity.

Whatever the reason, it most certainly was…an enchanted evening.

Seasons Passing

2006-09-30T00:12:00.000-04:00

I would like to leave you all with the following poem, one taught to me by my Father. It was one of his favorites, and I guess it was fitting since he passed away during the title month... Enjoy...

SEPTEMBER

by: Helen Hunt Jackson (1830-1885)

The golden-rod is yellow;
The corn is turning brown;
The trees in apple orchards
With fruit are bending down.

The gentian's bluest fringes
Are curling in the sun;
In dusty pods the milkweed
Its hidden silk has spun.

The sedges flaunt their harvest,
In every meadow nook;
And asters by the brook-side
Make asters in the brook.

From dewy lanes at morning
The grapes' sweet odors rise;
At noon the roads all flutter
With yellow butterflies.

By all these lovely tokens
September days are here,
With summer's best of weather,
And autumn's best of cheer.

But none of all this beauty
Which floods the earth and air
Is unto me the secret
Which makes September fair.

'T is a thing which I remember;
To name it thrills me yet:
One day of one September
I never can forget.

Second Chances

2006-09-28T22:13:00.001-04:00

For as long as I can remember, I have always enjoyed history. I think that it is important to understand where we have come from so we can know where to go in the future.

Maybe the greatest capability of mankind is the ability to learn and to grow, and we do that for the most part by trying, and failing, and trying, and failing, until we learn from our mistakes and develop the ability to accomplish that which we are trying to do. In other words, we are learning from the history we create. And following that thought, the study of history is simply learning from mistakes made by others…

I remember talking once with someone who had the opinion that where we can learn from history, we can not go back and fix the past.

But maybe, on some occasions, we can do just that by making changes in the here and now.

A few weeks ago I went back to where I grew up as the annual Fall Festival was happening. An old friend accompanied me as we were going to meet up with yet another old friend for the occasion. I also happened to find out once I was down in the area that someone else very special to me from the past was single again and I knew that I needed to get in touch with her. As it happened, or maybe as it was designed, we ran into each other at the Festival.

She and I had only spoken briefly twice over the past eighteen plus years, and both times we were involved with someone else. There were issues that needed to be discussed from all those years ago, mostly on my part, as I had caused her a lot of hurt in the past.

However, over the years, I also knew that I had never lost my love for her. I was totally surprised during the course of the conversation to find out that she held similar feelings to my own in spite of everything, and in spite of all the time that had passed.

Since that night we have spoken daily, and at length, on the phone and in e-mail. The opportunity to reconnect has been quite marvelous and I know we are both surprised at how open and comfortable we are with each other after all of time we have spent apart. We are looking forward to all of the phenomenal possibilities that the future might hold in store for us both.

But how does this fix the mistake made in the past? Because this very special person was once my wife, and I feel (as does she) that, where our separation may have been necessary in order for us both to grow up and become the adults we are today, it was still a mistake for us to divorce and now we have the possibility of correcting that mistake and rewriting a future together.

I Resemble These Remarks

2006-09-28T09:33:00.000-04:00

Ok... It's been awhile since I last posted, but I've been busy... And in a very good way... I hope to take a little time soon to post about it... But in the mean time, a cousin of mine sent me this and I thought I'd pass it along. I hope some of you reading this aren't to this stage in your life yet. As for the rest of us "older" people...

25 ways to know you have grown up

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh crap - what the h--- happened?"

Bonus:
26. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends 'cause you know they'll enjoy it & do. And now you know why I am forwarding this to you

Never Forget...

2006-09-11T20:07:00.000-04:00

How It Should Have Ended

2006-09-07T16:17:00.000-04:00

Real quick... If you find yourself with nothing to do and can't think of anything to do with the nothing to do time... Check out this site... I'm sure you'll find something to laugh at while killing some time.

The Crocodile Hunter

2006-09-04T13:43:00.001-04:00

As most of you will know by now, Steve Irwin was killed earlier today after being "...fatally pierced in the chest by a stingray barb while diving in Queensland's Batt Reef, which is part of the Great Barrier Reef."

I was saddened to hear this as I have always greatly enjoyed watching Steve bring nature into the living room in a very informative way, while at the same time doing so in a highly entertaining fashion. He ranked in the top three (in my book) of people whom I have most enjoyed watching that dealt with wildlife and discovery - Marlin Perkins (Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom) and Jacques-Yves Cousteau being the other two.

So Steve... It's a shame you couldn't have been able to say, "Crikey! That was a close one!," this time. We'll miss you, mate.

Land Of Confusion

2006-09-02T23:18:00.000-04:00

Anyone remember Phil Collins and Genesis? I would think it would be hard not to remember a group that managed to claim around 20 major awards in the 80's, not to mention about another 20 that Collins racked up on solo work.

In 1986, they released a video for a song called Land Of Confusion. Not only was the video great for its time {watch it here}, but the lyrics were well written, well thought out, and well applied.

Jump forward twenty years. This song has been masterfully re-done by the group Disturbed and the message in the lyrics apply just as much today as they ever did, if not more. But the true mastery is the songs video release. I usually wouldn't put a video tie in into my blog, but this is an exception. I hope you all enjoy.

Labor Day Weekend

2006-09-02T20:19:00.000-04:00

First... I hope everyone enjoys the Labor Day Weekend.

Second... If it is Labor Day Weekend, what am I doing at the office working?!?

I think I want a new profession....

Accolades Where They Are Due

2006-09-02T13:38:00.000-04:00

Well… It pains me somewhat to do so, but I have to tip my virtual hat to one particular liberal that I usually have more contempt for than Bill (or Hillary) Clinton…

Albert Arnold Gore, Jr. Al Gore… Mr. Internet…

Al recently was in the land of my ancestors… Scotland. While he was there, talking his usual “green” talk amongst other things, he touched on something very important, very disturbing, not to mention very vital, about media and democracy. He said, “Democracy is under attack.”

His thoughts are directed at fears he has (along with a lot of other Americans, including myself) that too few people (or companies) are gaining a consolidated control of available media outlets, including T.V., radio, newspapers, etc. Al went on further to say, “Democracy is a conversation and the most important role of the media is to facilitate that conversation of democracy. Now the conversation is more controlled, it is more centralized.”

BAM! He hit the nail on the head and he is entirely correct. The media of today is too controlled by too few people with too few points of view. And, not to belabor the point, but the vast majority of the media is controlled and directed by those with a left side liberal point of view.

That is one of the reasons I spend very little time watching the TV for my source of news. By the time something makes it onto TV in the way of news, the liberal spin is SO heavy that it is painful to watch. Not only that, but I simply can not trust it because I KNOW it is slanted. It is biased… It is analyzed to death… Facts are not presented from an objective view point so you can make up your own mind… Your opinion of the event is GIVEN to you… Sometimes by a whole team of liberal spin doctors who already have it all figured out…

Look at several notable TV news personalities who could not (or would not) contain their liberal view points when trying to present the “news” to the rest of America: Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Mike Wallace, Bryant Gumbel, and Connie Chung just to name a few. Then you have the type like Wolf Blitzer and Katie Couric…with liberal points of view, but who have a little too much air between their ears to be taken seriously.

Or, you have some Fox News (as much as I hate to say it because I still kind of like Fox) camera man who was captured by Islamic jihadists saying how “…he can’t condemn his captors…” because “…In some ways, I feel such sympathy for the Palestinian cause. You know, in my heart. You know, I can’t hate them for what they did…there’s a funny bit of me that’s sympathetic to them still.” WHAT!?!?!? What freaking drugs are you on man!!! Well… I’m sure he’s just suffering from Stockholme Syndrome. I mean, these are the people that cut other peoples heads off with dull knives while hiding behind head scarves yelling “Allahu Akbar” and taping the event. But he’s sympathetic to them… Right…

I’m not going to try to fit in newspapers and magazines at the moment, but they too play a major role in telling people what they should think instead of presenting facts and fostering dialog and constructive thinking.

So who is to blame for making this situation worse? The answer might surprise you… It wasn’t the liberals (who may have started it). It is the Republicans that may have push it all over the edge. Or, at least, it is the Republican controlled FCC. You see, a few years ago, this wonderful waste of our taxpaying dollars voted to make legal the ownership of up to three TV stations, eight radio stations, the local paper, AND the cable system in a SINGLE media market!!! One person or corporation can own it all now thus denying the majority of the local populace of what is needed most when it comes to democracy; differing dialog and debate without a single point of interference with regards to point of view. And it is this that Al Gore finds to be a problem and rightly so.

We need an independent press. We must have an independent press. But until journalism returns to its roots, forgets about trying to make the King, and turns away from seeing how much profit can be made by making news instead of simply reporting news, we the people are going to continue to have to muddle our way through events hoping that what it is we hear and read is actually fact and not someone else’s fiction.

And as for Al Gore? Good job… I’m with you… On this one…

Butch The Rooster

2006-08-31T12:52:00.000-04:00

[Humor sent from a cousin of mine...]

John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred
young layers (hens, called pullets) and eight or ten roosters, whose job
was to fertilize the eggs. The farmer kept records, and any rooster that
didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful
lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his
roosters.

Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance which
rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an
efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch; a very fine specimen he was
too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch’s bell hadn't
rung at all! John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing
pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would
run for cover.

But to Farmer John's amazement, Butch had his bell in his beak, so it
couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the
next one. John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the county fair
and Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result... The judges not only awarded Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize"
but they also awarded him the "Pullet Surprise" as well.

Clearly Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician
could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our
planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them
when they weren't paying attention?

Vampires and a Hit Man

2006-08-31T00:01:00.000-04:00

I’m not exactly fond of living the “single life” as it were so I find myself trying to kill some of the lonely time either with reading, music, the Net, or by watching movies.

It has become a small rut in which about every weekend three or four movies are picked up at a local video store just to have something around through the week as a boredom buster measure.

A couple of titles picked up recently ended up surprising me somewhat and I thought I’d share a quick thought…

I have, for a long time, enjoyed Pierce Brosnan as an actor. Even slightly before his “Remington Steele” days I had taken note of him. Over the years, with a minor exception early on, I have not been disappointed. So, I see on the shelf a movie he did last year that I had not seen called The Matador. When you look at the front of the DVD case, you expect something more along the lines of a Bond or Taffin style action flick. You could not be more wrong. I won’t tell anything about the story line… no spoilers here. I will only say that this is a REALLY well done and well acted movie with some great comedic moments. It’s worth the rent, and come to think of it, would have been worth the price of admission…

I’ve also been recently drawn towards movies with a vampirism theme. Sometimes it is quite hard to really find a good one. So… I happen to look down towards the bottom shelf on the wall and I see cover that caught my eye. It looked cool enough that I went ahead, picked it up, and started reading the back. It basically read like a Sci-Fi meets Vampires type story, and I really didn’t expect much, but I figured what the heck. As it turns out, the movie is low budget as you would expect, the “acting” is way over done at times (especially by Michael Ironside, but that's normal for him), and the story line is fairly predictable… However, having said that, I would still suggest picking up Vampire Wars: Battle For The Universe, (a.k.a. Bloodsuckers) This movie too has a few really good comedic moments. And, if nothing else, Natassia Malthe makes black leather look GOOD.

Memories...

2006-08-26T21:14:00.000-04:00

I've been thinking about my father recently.... I guess it started earlier in the week when I noticed that August was almost gone and that September was soon to arrive. September was a time of the year my father always liked, and it is also the month in which he died. My father, over the course of his life, had memorized many poems, speeches, etc., but the one I remember him quoting the most was one titled 'September' by Helen Hunt Jackson, and every year since his death I've always printed out that poem and hung it where ever I happen to be working.

But... Back to thinking... I was in the grocery store earlier in the afternoon and as I was picking through the produce, I saw some green beans in a bin on sale. I started thinking about a way that Dad used to fix green beans for Sunday dinner once in awhile...something he had learned from an Aunt that had helped to raise him and his brothers. It's very simple really... Take a pan big enough for how ever many beans you are going to fix... Put in enough tomato juice to cook the beans in without floating them, add some bacon, some chopped onion, a little garlic if you want (I use fresh), some salt, pepper, a couple of dashes of sugar (to cut down on the tomato), and bring those items to a boil and then simmer for about ten minutes or so. Then add the beans, lower the heat, and cook to how ever you like your beans...but long enough to flavor. If you need to thicken the juice a little before you're ready to server (it will thicken on it own some) you can add just a little flour or corn starch.

That's it... Nothing fancy... Takes little time to prepare, an for me, about 1 ½ to 2 hours to cook as I like my beans cooked down.

Well... This all ran though my mind very quickly and right now, the apartment is full of an odor that I remember from my childhood. Thank you Dad, and thank you Aunt Grace.

Geek On

2006-08-24T22:55:00.000-04:00

The year was 1995... It was August... I was a little over two months past a divorice and still reeling from the changing realities of my existance. And... I was pretty bored at work.

That's when I was asked if I would like to take the Technical Lead position for a new account that my company was bringing on-line. It was real high tech stuff... The company we would be providing support for was called Silicon Graphics Inc. (SGI). They were located in Mt. View, CA, and made very high end Unix systems. And when they said high end, they weren't kidding at the time.

The version of Unix they had created was called Irix, an so was my introduction into the world of the uber-geek operating systems.

I had fun... I spent two weeks at their HQ in San Jose learning a lot of cool things, playing with a lot of cool toys, got to see Huey Lewis and the News live at their summer picnic (complete with catered food, big tubs of ice cold beer, and California girls), and over all had a pretty good time for the next twelve months working on that account.

But that was pretty much the last time I touched Unix... Until last weekend. I've finally loaded SuSE Linux on my laptop, and am doing the best I can to not touch the World of Microsoft in order to get back into the swing of things as fast as possible within the next two to three months.

Needless to say... I'm a bit rusty... But, it's amazing what's popping back into my head every day. And, I still love the pure geek factor... Like now, for instance, as I post into my blog directly from a little utility built into SuSE. I mean... It's no big deal really... There were utilities like this that I could have downloaded, installed into Windows XP Pro, and done the same thing... But... Since this is already here... What the heck...

Ok... Enough of my non-life for now... We now return you to your regularly scheduled program in progress... Michelle Branch and Santana... I'm Feeling You...

Liberalism Is A Mental Disorder

2006-08-23T20:58:00.000-04:00

Anyone who spends the majority of their time listing to the AM dial and has an interest in politics should recognize the phrase “Liberalism is a mental disorder...” For those of you who might not recognize this witty combination of words, it is something coined by the conservative Independent talk-show host Michael Savage. It was also the title of the third book of a trilogy he has written regarding the cause and effect of the declining moral values in America.

As a registered Republican, but in truth, a political Centrist, I can appreciate several of the points that Dr. Savage raises from time to time even if I frequently am of the opinion that his fervor could be moderated a bit in order to make the points of his message more palatable to the masses. But, truth is truth and his points are backed by documented facts.

For a little over a month now, I haven't created a single post in my blog. I have tried to make a few posts in other blogs, but I've been busy (week business trip to St. Louis, increased work load in general, working with my new SUSE Linux 10.1 laptop, etc.). One thing I was able to do, however, is finish reading the book on whence this post is titled.

I'm not going to sit here and go through a whole book review. I am simply going to say that this book, along with The Savage Nation and The Enemy Within, are worth your time and attention.

What I am going to say is simply this... I am of the opinion that Dr. Savage is correct. Liberalism is a mental disorder, and the disorder is so profound and ingrained within the mind of the liberal, that nothing short of their complete and utter destruction to the sub-atomic level seems to have a chance of removing said disorder. Why would I say something like this? Because, people...or as Dr. Savage likes to say, “sheeple”...I listen to both sides, I observe both sides, I collect information from both sides, I process this information, I form my own opinion, and I keep my mouth shut until I feel I have the requisite facts necessary to share a then informed (key word... INFORMED), opinion.

I've listened to liberals like John Kerry, Ted Kennedy, John Murtha, Hillary Clinton, Dick Durbin, Barbara Boxer, Patrick Leahy, John Edwards, Dianne Feinstein, Nancy Pelosi, and the rest of their ilk.

I've watched time after time the liberal push to undermine the security of this nation, to discredit a sitting president in a time of war, how they have treated one of their own - Sen. Joe Lieberman - because he happens to disagree on one point with the rest of the nut cases when it comes to the security of this nation and the war on terror and instead are now backing a true radical liberal, Ned Lamont, as a replacement.

I have read their articles on how America should cut and run once again when it comes to the war on terror. I've read the liberals words vilifying our troops (anyone remember Viet Nam?) in various hot zones around the globe. I've read the diatribe laid out on moveon.org which may be the single most dangerous organization ever conceived of in the history of the United States. I've read their words of appeasement, tolerance, and understanding when it comes on how to deal with the Islamic “freedom fighters.” (NOTE TO LIBERALS: Study your FREAKING history... See what appeasement did for Neville Chamberlain.)

And, I have formed my opinions. Liberalism is a mental disorder and needs to quarantined if this country is to be preserved. Not since the 1940's has this country faced so grave of a threat as the fifth column growing within our boarders knows as liberalism. We think that radical Islamic terrorists are a threat to our society, and make no mistake, they are, but when compared to several of our own Senators, Congressmen, and organizations like moveon.org, the terrorists are nothing.

Maybe you have noticed something as you have been reading this post... I have frequently used the term liberal but not once have I used the term Democrat. Where it is true that liberalism springs from the Democratic party, I do not believe that all Democrats are liberals. But what has happened to the Democratic party since the end of Jimmy Carter's presidency is simply this... The radical liberal elements of the Democratic party have taken control and usurped that which the Democratic party once was. In other words, this isn't the Democratic party of men like Franklin Roosevelt, or Harry Truman, or JFK. No... This is now a party controlled by degenerates. (And I think if you will look closely enough, you will find that a lot of the people now in control of the Democratic party have something in common... It's called the 1960's.)

This is a party that is not interested in the United States being a Republic, but instead would like us to be Socialist. This is the party of Political Correctness, Historic Revisionism, tolerance for Islam but not Christianity, the belief that killing an unborn child is good and killing a convicted child rapist/murderer is bad. This is a party that will tell you the ACLU is the next best thing to come along since buttered toast but the National Rifle Association is worse than the anti-Christ.

Just as I would not want to see the Republican Party controlled by the Christian Coalition, neither do I want to see the Democratic Party being controlled by the lunatic fringe currently in power. Even though I think that Pat Buchanan is a good man, and one who is contemplative and makes several good points a lot of the time, I would not want to see him as President of the United States because I find him to be too far to one side. I'm not even going to get into what I've thought about liberal candidates over the past 25 years.

This is really quite simple... The American people need to take back control of their country from the far left and the far right. We need to step in and say enough. We can not afford to have this country run by inmates. We can NOT afford to have knee jerk reactionaries playing God with our country. We can not afford to buy fully into the “party line” and expect this country to survive. But what does this mean? It means people need to get involved. They are going to have to become informed on issues and then act with the information they have at hand. But the key to this is being informed. (Let's face it, the Fifteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was well meaning, but has done a great disservice to our country. The simple fact is that a vast majority of the citizens of this country are simply to ignorant to be out voting for the future of our society.)

If you are a Democrat, I implore you to reconsider your allegiance to your party as it currently exists. Either take it back, or help the rest of us who prefer common sense to help define this country.

If you are a liberal... You have my sympathies. Maybe you can change. Maybe some day research will lead us to a cure for your malady. Maybe you will “move on” out of the country to a place where your ideologies (no matter how well intentioned they may be) will no longer harm this country and cause me grief. Maybe you will wake up and realize that once again, you are on the wrong side of history and if you stay your present course, your ultimate destruction will be as assured as the rest of us you are dragging down with you.

Another Week Closer To Death

2006-07-21T14:17:00.000-04:00

Well, a least the past week has been, well, um, it's been.

Spent last weekend with my son which is always cool. Lost a tire on the car. Had another tire put on the car. Found out an old friend wasn't going to make it into town after all - because of a car. (Maybe it's like 'Devil Car' or something...) Haven't been able to sleep very well, which leaves me tired an in a foul mood. And... Just when I think that maybe progress is being made with my estranged significant other, I manage to, once again, do something to irritate her.

And this morning I get up, start dressing for work, go to put my dress shoes on, and found out a cat had yakked in one of them.

I wonder what next week will be like...

Neo-Shakespeare Concept

2006-07-13T16:04:00.000-04:00

Cry Havoc!!! And let slip the Marmosets of Malevolence...

South Park Caricature

2006-07-10T12:00:00.000-04:00

Ok... Thanks to The Lonely Infidel, I had to try this site he posted that allows you to make South Park caricatures. So, the following would be me in South Park...

Hit the link above to his site if you'd like to try this for yourself...

My Theme Song........???

2006-07-08T18:43:00.000-04:00

I "stole" this off of Winter's Blog, and it seems to be geared towards women, but... It fits... I was actually thinking "Veteran Of The Psychic Wars" myself...

Your Theme Song is Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd

"There is no pain, you are receding. A distant ship's smoke on the horizon. You are only coming through in waves.

You haven't been feeling a lot lately, and you think that's a good thing. The comfortable part is nice...but you should really work on numb."

What's Your Theme Song?

Let Freedom Ring!

2006-07-03T23:06:00.000-04:00

“Oh, say can you see by the dawn’s early light
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight’s last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars thru the perilous fight,
O’er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?
And the rocket’s red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?"
The Star Spangled Banner
By Francis Scott Key

On July 4, 1776, in Philadelphia, PA, a document penned by Thomas Jefferson was approved by the Continental Congress. The original ideal of the Continental Congress was to draft a letter that declared the United Colonies to no longer be subject to the Crown or Parliament of Great Britain, and to stipulate that said colonies were free and independent. This document became known to the world as The Declaration of Independence. If you know anything about American history, then you know what followed over the next seven years. And if for some reason you don’t know, please go and educate yourself about the American Revolutionary War.

The Fourth of July… Independence Day… Maybe the greatest secular holiday celebrated in this country. A day that passed with little fan fare a year after the original document was signed. In fact, it was only celebrated in Philadelphia with a ceremonial dinner, bells, bonfires, and…fireworks. (In 1788, Philadelphia held a grand celebration on the Fourth of July as this year also marked the ratification of the Constitution.) Boston had adopted the celebration in 1783, and eventually, this patriotic celebration spread throughout the land with parades, patriotic displays, picnics, and fireworks. In other words, it continues to be celebrated much as it was over two hundred years ago.

Ask yourself, now, why you celebrate this particular holiday. I hope that your answer isn’t something as simple as you like to see fireworks make pretty colors in the sky, or that you like it just because it’s another day you don’t have to go to work, or because you like stuffing your face with Carnie food. (FYI… I like the color displays, I like not having to work, and I like a smothered foot long hot dog as much as anyone else.)

But, in my not so humble opinion, this holiday should not be about food, or fun, or taking the day off. This holiday should be a day for reflection, for appreciation, and for thanks. This is a day in history that a minority group stood up and said, “Enough!! We’re not going to take this unjust treatment anymore! We’re through! It’s our turn now!” This little band of rebels stood up to the Empire against all odds and fought. They fought for freedoms they had never had before, for ideals that were not approved of by the government, and for a way of life that was fair and just. They fought… Men died… And a new nation was born… “…conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.”

And two hundred and thirty years later, I was able to take my son to see a fireworks display in small town America so he could see the colors in the sky, and listen to his father whisper in his ear about how his country came to exist. Does he remember that right now? No… All he remembers are the “pretty colors.” But some day, he will know, and he will remember, just like his father does now because of how my father raised me, and taught me from a very early age.

Many have died over the course of this countries history to ensure we still enjoy the freedoms we have today. I would imagine that many more may die to ensure it is never taken away from us. From Lexington & Concord, New Orleans, Bull Run & Gettysburg, San Juan Hill, through France & Germany, Korea, Viet Nam, Kuwait & Iraq, and Afghanistan, American's have fought and are fighting to keep our country free. Support them, honor them, and most importantly………thank them!

Remember this the next time you hear that the United States has no business fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq. On September 11, 2001, the United States was attacked by foreign forces. The last official count I saw on the deaths caused was 2,819. To find a single day death toll greater than this number you would have to go back to the American Civil War and revisit Antietam where we lost about 4000 men (Union and Confederate – Americans either way). To compare, the United States lost 2,403 lives the last time the She was attacked by surprise at Pearl Harbor.

Thomas Jefferson is quoted as saying, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” The truth is that price exacts even a greater toll. It also needs sacrifice, honor, and dedication. And it needs the support of the American people.

My Fellow Americans!!!! Join me on this day, July 4, our Independence Day in celebrating our Country, our Flag, our Troops, and OUR FREEDOM!!!!

I leave you with a quote from a most controversial person... Think long and hard about what he says and how correct he was:

"What luck for the rulers that men do not think..." -- Adolf Hitler

Dragons of Autumn Twilight

2006-06-30T12:16:00.000-04:00

It was 1984. It was an interesting year for me to say the least and one that had profound impact on the course of my life.

But in this entry, I will only focus on one small event from that period 22 years ago; the beginning of something that has left an indelible mark on the literary world and continues to have relevance.

The first book in the now infamous DragonLance series, Dragons of Autumn Twilight, was released in April of that year. Already an avid player in the worlds of AD&D, it was only fitting that I procure this tome as it was a new world with new adventures set within the growing AD&D universe. The authors, Margaret Weis & Tracy Hickman, did not disappoint.

Why the sudden mention of this, you might inquire? The answer is simple… I was just reading my daily dose of SCI FI Wire News and noticed an article dealing with the emenint release of an animated motion picture in the fall of 2007. True, that a movie was in the works is not “new” news, but I now consider it a given since SCI FI has made mention of the event.

I personally hope for an IMAX release… It would be well worth shilling out the cash for such an experience.
____________________________________________________________

'Hope is the denial of reality. It is the carrot dangled before the draft horse to keep him plodding along in a vain attempt to reach it.'

'Are you saying we should just give up?' Tanis asked, irritably tossing the bark away.

'I'm saying we should remove the carrot and walk forward with our eyes open,' Raistlin answered.

____________________________________________________________

Should you like to read more about this movie, you may visit the Official DragonLance Movie Site.

But What To Say...

2006-06-29T23:31:00.000-04:00

I have never had cause to correspond with an incarcerated individual. In retrospect, I am thinking this is a good thing as it would seem, prima facie, that during the course of my life I have made wise decisions in those I call friend. This is not, however, to say that I have not the occasional lapse in good judgment or at the very least, my perceptions and intuitions have failed me, but all in all, the odds have favored me.

Twice so far, someone I called friend has committed an act that has greatly offended my sensibilities.

The first time this happened, the betrayal was against me personally, and my only thought was to remove the person from the planet. And to be totally honest, I still feel the same way every time I pause to think about the incident. The motto of the Montresors in Poe’s The Cask of Amontillado – Nemo me impune lacessit (No one provokes me with impunity) – has always been a personal favorite of mine. But I digress… Needless to say, the “friendship” was, is, and forever shall be dead to me.

The second time this happened, the betrayal was against me, but not personally. It was against my perceptions of someone I have known for more than a quarter of a century and it was the actions against others – of the type most reviled in our society - that I could not condone. And at present, their lack of control and judgment is being punished in the form of a multi-year incarceration.

Letters have been sent by this person to those of us who are known friends. To date, I know of no letters that have been drafted from us and returned in kind. The most recent letter received today indicates a high level of despair, longing, and need from our friend for some means of moral support. And yet… What do I say?

How is life behind bars suiting you? Made friends with any of the other offenders there yet? Anyone made you their “personal” friend yet? What is the shower scene like? How is the food? Heard from anyone else in the family, or have they pretty much disavowed you? What the HELL is wrong with you?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Well… We are friends… Nothing is going to change that simple fact. There is no requirement of friendship that stipulates one must like, understand, or condone any action taken by the other. So, I have been remiss and I need to make amends.

But what to say…

Sui Caedere

2006-06-27T00:05:00.000-04:00

"...But everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means..." -- Staind

No, these lyrics in It's Been Awhile by Staind aren't about suicide... But they could, I think, make up a core feeling in a song about suicide. I mean, it's not like there aren't enough songs out there on the subject, but still...

Anyone ever thought about suicide? No, I don't mean, have you thought about offing yourself. Have you just ever simply stopped to think about suicide, what it is, and why it has a presence that transcends all cultures, religions, and philosophies?

If for nothing else, it is an interesting concept in that in all of the species known to the world, suicide is only practiced by humans. No other creature known will kill itself simply for the sake of having the desire to cease to exist. Let’s try that again… No other form of animal or insect known by man will act to kill itself simply for the sake of ending its existence. Why?

Isn’t man supposed to be at the very top of the food chain? Are we not the most intellectual species know to the planet? We use tools, we have created vast civilizations, we can adapt to live in any region on the planet, we can split the atom, and we’ve walked on the moon…. And yet… We are the only living things that will also terminate our own existence in the universe.

Some cultures reject suicide for legal reasons, or religious reasons, or for whatever reason. Some cultures consider it to be honorable. Some consider it acceptable when ‘X’ is the reason, but not because of ‘Y’ or ‘Z.’ Some could care less…

What do we think of people who commit suicide? That they are: selfish, stupid, enlightened, depressed, unbalance, evil, damned, saved, better off, worse off, brave, cowards, vindictive, hopeless….what else?

How do we feel about the person who wants to commit suicide to get back at his ex-wife for having to pay so much money in support?

How do we feel about the 95 year old in the nursing home in pain most of the waking hours, who can no longer see well enough to read or watch TV, or hear to listen to radio or music, and is confined to a wheelchair, but is to weak to move themselves around and wants to commit suicide?

How do we feel about the person who simply has had enough of life and living in this world and is tired of plodding through life day after day after day after...

Tired… Tired of thinking… Tired of feeling… Tired of the endless struggle… Tired of… Consequences...

Balo!!! Eat My Freaking Shorts!!!!

2006-06-22T23:34:00.000-04:00

How time truly slips away… I actually enjoy taking part in the phenomena of the blogging. It is a good way to get some of my thoughts out of my head. It is a good way to “hear” the thoughts of people who matter to me. It is a good way to find out what other people have on their mind… Which usually ends up having the result of putting more thoughts in my head; filling up the space I emptied in the first place. No wonder I can’t keep my head clear these days.

I’ve noticed for a long time now, however, that I haven’t been paying attention to the World of Blog. It’s not because I’m not interested… It’s not because I have no desire to participate… I just simply haven’t had the energy. That’s actually strange for me as I’ve always maintained a very active on-line presence going way back before the time of the Internet. (Anyone remember FIDO Net?)

No… It’s been a matter of energy. And it has been impacting far more than my blogging. It’s been noticeable all over the place. And there’s been this damn dizziness… And other things… So… I figured it was about time to try and find out what the problem might be which required a little trip to the doctor.

[/INTERLUDE] I’m sitting here watching an old Billy Idol video, “To Be A Lover,” and I can’t help but notice… Just how totally cool 80’s music videos really were. I mean, I remember seeing this when it came out in the mid-80’s on MTV. When MTV still ran music videos. [/INTERLUDE OFF]

So Dr. Howse (no affiliation with, or resemblance to, Dr. House) sends me off to the vampires so they can run a few blood tests. General stuff… And those came back in and now it’s off for more targeted tests. I’m like, OK, so what are you targeting? (Talking to the nurse at the time…) And she’s being a little vague on the specifics… Having that whole, “Well… Let’s conduct the tests and see what the results are before we draw conclusions…” attitude and tone in her voice, which was starting to annoy me, but hell, right now, almost anything and everything is annoying me… And I had an epiphany… And I said, “You think I’m diabetic…” Pause in conversation… Response, “Well, yes, that what it looks like but we don’t want to alarm you…”

Now, I was at a client site working on some communications issues and had walked outside to take this call… It’s hot… It’s humid… I had just gotten off the phone about three minutes before the docs office called after getting into a screaming match with an idiot working for Ameritech, uh, SBC, uh, AT&T…yeah, AT&T now, because they hadn’t properly punched down a new T1 at their Central Office…a line that is already FIVE FREAKING WEEKS OVER DUE…and we had been PROMISED that it would be ready and operational before 10:00 a.m. this morning…and now here I am hearing that I most likely have a disease that is the number six killer in the U.S. All I could say was simply… “Well…. FUCK!”

Of course, I apologized, but she told me that it was quite alright and how a good number of patients say something very similar when hearing something like this, and that, in fact, she’d most likely utter about the same.

[/INTERLUDE II] Still watching videos… B.O.C.’s Burning For You. Love It!!! They did this song during the last concert I saw. [/INTERLUDE II OFF]

Well… The good thing is I can look forward to feeling better…eventually. Which would be good, since it’s been way, way, way, dare I say once again, way…to long since I took the time to bore anyone with my little corner of the multi-verse. I have a few other things I could go into… But that’s another entry for another day.

Horrible Sci-Fi At It's Worse!

2006-05-03T17:57:00.000-04:00

Please note this image is brought to you complements of a thought another random slacker put into my head. Enjoy!

There are those who believe… That life here… Began out there.

2006-05-02T00:39:00.000-04:00

And so began the narration to, at the time, what was the biggest budget pilot episode of a television series ever to air: Battlestar Galactica

I remember the day very well… September 17, 1978. It was a Saturday. When the show started, I was enthralled and became an instant loyal fan…one might even say fanatical. Yeah, the show had similar story line problems of a lot of 70’s shows, but still… It was cool, I loved the look of the Galactica (still one of my most favorite space ship designs) and I really hated when they canceled the show. (I won’t even mention the disaster known as Galactica: 1980… We had high hopes, but it simply sucked scummy pond water.)

For many, many years I had dreamed of somehow this show being brought back. As the years went by, however, it seemed less and less likely that we would ever see more of this show. Then, I saw where Richard Hatch was trying to revive the franchise by doing a continuation of the original show set many years later with the fleet still searching for Earth. I understand that several of the original cast were interested, and then… Bam! It was announced that indeed, Battlestar Galactica was coming back!!!!!! As a re-imaged production…

I wasn’t sure what to think of that at the time since many of these “re-imaged” shows end up not being very good… Witness Planet of the Apes… But… Still… After over twenty years, it was coming back. To the Sci-Fi channel.

That took care of the issue for me… I wouldn’t be watching. I haven’t subscribed to cable T.V. for about three years now. I was spending over $1000 and still sitting around going, “There’s nothing on T.V.!” And, I was never around the house to watch a lot of T.V. anyway, so I had ditched it and went back to the good old fashion antenna. Local programming only…

Ok… So two seasons of the new Galactica has come and gone, and I have seen every once in awhile stories on how great this new show is, how well it is doing, and I’ve wondered… What is it really like… So, I finally decided it was time to find out.

I researched the episode guide, and I settled on three that dealt with a Battlestar Pegasus story arc. Using today’s technology I, uh, “acquired” these three episodes and watched them tonight. All I can say is, WOW! Once again I felt like a little kid, enthralled by the magic that is known as science fiction. Here are solid story lines, with exceptional characters, good effects, and it simply reaches out, takes hold of you, and draws you into their universe. SO… Maybe it’s time to get cable again. Even if it’s only for this one show.

For now, I’m currently, uh, acquiring more episodes to view until I can get the DVD’s.

Invasion Of The Low Paying Job Seekers

2006-04-29T00:06:00.000-04:00

I have, until recently, been divided in my thoughts regarding a popular topic: Illegal Immigration. I was going to discuss the history of cheap labor in this country, and even look at the social economics of the issue. But at present, I'm feeling a little more emotional about the issue...

First of all, I am no longer inclined to look at the predominant peoples in question, citizens of Mexico, as immigrants – if they are here illegally. After all, the definition of an immigrant is one who comes to a country to take up permanent residence. They come, as is customary with past immigrants to this country that you hear them talking about, to adopt their new country as their own. They come to embrace the culture of this country as their own. They come and learn how to speak the language of this country, which is English. They come to help build the country as well as prosper in what is arguably the best country on the planet. Does this mean they have to forget where they came from, or the culture they were raised in and have nothing to do with it? NO!!! But it does mean that America and all that she is should come FIRST if they truly have immigrated.

No, I now refuse to refer to these people as Illegal Immigrants. I am not going to talk about “Guest Workers” either. I will, however, reference illegal migrants (those who move around looking for work) who are becoming quite bothersome. In fact, I am now over the middle mark leaning toward rounding every last freaking one of them up and throwing them back across the boarder. Two recent developments have me feeling this way: the proposed boycott on Monday to cause as much disruption as possible and the new Spanish version of our national anthem.

I have long understood why we have illegal migrants from Mexico. I know what these people are facing if they stay in Mexico. I have spent enough time in that country, gotten off of the beaten path and looked around, and have seen first hand the abject poverty that so many are forced to live in down there. I have seen families - families with small children, babies, the aged, living in shacks that are so shoddy most Americans wouldn’t store their garden tools in them. I have seen the working conditions down there in a lot of places. I have watched so many of these people trying to catch a ride miles away so they can get to their jobs, and if they can’t find transportation, they walk for miles to try and make a living. Yes indeed, I know why they come here, why they bring (or want to have) their children here if they can. I also realize why they are important to this country, but at the same time, a drain on this country that should not be tolerated forever.

Where I understand all of this, it does not change the fact that they are here illegally. Period. They are a slap in our face, and in the face of those who have come here before them legally. And now, they are acting as if they are entitled to be rewarded for breaking our laws, violating our sovereignty, and mandating that we accept and embrace their culture within our own boarders. This does not sound like someone who wants to blend into our society.

I have compadres in Mexico. I like Mexico. I like the culture down there, I like the food down there, I have had MANY great times and experiences down there. I know these are good people, they are hard working people. However, I can not sanction putting them above the interests and well being of my fellow Americans.

If you want to immigrate to this country, please do so, but do it legally. Embrace our culture, our society, learn our language, and become one of us. We welcome you. If you want be in this country for awhile working, with the intent of going back home, which is fine as long as you are doing it legally. If you do not fall into either of these categories, then I think it is time for you to leave. We will get along without you. Maybe wages will have to rise for certain jobs, with the cost being passed along to the consumer, but that is acceptable. In the long run, it should still save the citizens of this country the cost of supporting people who want the American dream – without being a true part of America.

A Mundane Political Type Ramble...

2006-04-24T15:30:00.000-04:00

I’ve refrained from making too many comments about social issues… Partly due to some of the “spirited” debate that can be generated, but mostly due to how furious…yet powerless…I feel when reviewing yet again some totally asinine thing our government has done. And, for a large part, it is the Democrats that I find to be totally out of their freaking minds… But on occasion, some Republican will join them.

Yeah, I’m a registered Republican, but that is only due to there being no other party out there at the moment that I can totally identify with as I am a Centrist when it comes to politics. I could care less where a good idea comes from, or how a good compromise is derived, as long as it is good for the people of this country. I find it a total shame that we are nothing more than a two party body politick given that was not the case during the early history of our country. Yeah, yeah, yeah… Libertarians, Labor Party, Grassroots Party, Communist Party… Blah, blah, blah… We also have the American Nazi Party, Marijuana Party, Peace and Freedom Party, and the Green Party just to name a few. Woo Hoo…

Last time I checked, there were two or three Independent’s in Congress, one in the Senate (?) with everyone else being a Republican or Democrat. Face it… Two Party System! And at the moment, I can’t exactly say I like any of them.

I’ll go on the record right now and tell you I voted for George W. not only once, but twice. Both times it was not because he was a Republican, it was not because I thought the man would make a good president, it was simply that I felt he was the lesser of two bad candidates. Let’s face it… Al Gore???? John Kerry???? NOT!!!!!!! But I would also have liked to be able to say, George W. Bush???? NOT!!!!!!! But I can’t… There were only two candidates. And yeah, I mean viable candidates.

So… Here we are, second term, a little under three years to go. And then what? For the Democrats, Mr. Chappaquiddick is saying he would endorse Kerry again. (Ted… Wake up Ted… You went senile back in 1969… Someone since then has had their hand sticking up your anus using you like a Muppet.) Let’s see… Hillary? Howard Dean??? (That would be good… He’s pretty much insane too…) OH, OH!!! I’ve got it!!! Maybe Reverend Al will lead the donkeys to victory! Of course, on the Republican side, things look pretty bleak as well. The only possible bright spot might be if Rudy Giuliani were to go ahead and run.

There are days when I look at the state of affairs and wish that Hale Bopp would come back, that Applewhite as right about the UFO, and that pretty much every politician in Washington D.C. would become an instant resident on the mother ship. There are times when starting from scratch isn’t the worse thing to do… Well, I don’t really look for that to happen, so we’re stuck with what we have…until the next elections…assuming enough people take interest and take action. Which should happen right about the time that big UFO comes by…

Up next... Observations on immigration...

Forward...

2006-04-22T16:22:00.000-04:00

I have been quiet for almost a month again. It is not because I haven’t had a lot of things on my mind that I could have shared. On the contrary, had I been selecting topics to post on I would have had difficulty in selecting just a single point to focus on given all of the things going on in the world that I am quite incensed about these days.

No… I think I have been decompressing over the past weeks. I have been purging myself of days, months, and years of angst. I have been, in doing little, accomplishing much in letting stress flow from my being and finding calm in my life.

Of course, not all is still right, but at the moment, things are looking up, not down, and that alone is sufficient. I think it is about time, now, to resume other activities that I enjoy.

A Cockeyed Optimist...

2006-03-23T14:07:00.000-05:00

I learned an appreciation for music from being exposed to it ever since I came into existence. My mother taught music, had started playing the piano (correctly by ear) around the age of five, and afforded me the opportunity to learn about music - especially musicals from the 40’ & 50’.

I’ve been somewhat introspective since the beginning of the year, and I’ve been thinking about my propensities for viewing many things from the negative side of the fence… (That, in turn, reminded me of one particular song that get’s on my nerves whenever I hear it… A Cockeyed Optimist from South Pacific.) But, as I have often pointed out, if you expect the worse from the beginning, you can not be disappointed; you can only be pleasantly surprised.

In reality, I do not consider myself to be pessimistic; nor am I an optimist. Instead, I feel myself to be an analyzer. I analyze anything, everything, at all times… I look for what could possibly go wrong; I look for what could possibly go right… I want to know the immediate impact, the short term impact, and the long term impact. I immediately start trying to find an answer to everything. It’s what I do for a career, which I started working towards when I was 10 years old. It is so much what I am that there seems to be no switch for it…

Of course… It does present problems from time to time… And every so often, even with all the careful contemplation I can muster, I still find myself flipping a coin. Maybe there is something to being an optimist. Maybe I should have taken lessons from an old love of mine who was in real life, at the time, the epitome of A Cockeyed Optimist.

No Turning Back...

2006-03-22T15:09:00.000-05:00

I was recently having a conversation with an old friend of mine out west. We have managed to keep touch over the years and it’s good to catch up on what we’ve been doing, how our families are, etc.

We used to work for the same company and had been brought into this location along with about 8 other high end I.T. types for the start-up of a new project. We found out we had a lot in common and developed a good friendship quickly.

He asked me if I had heard anything from a certain someone I had been…close with…back in those times. I had a few images pass my minds eye, felt a few feelings I hadn’t felt in years, and then said, no, I hadn’t. I came to feel it was time to close the door on that chapter of my life and to go forward… Not turn back…

But it also reminded me of a conversation I had with someone special to me about a decade ago. The subject was basically can we ever turn back… Can we get back to a place where we were at one point in time to basically then go forward, but in a different direction this time… I thought then that we could, she was skeptical, but tried… And we failed…

Maybe…. Sometimes.… That which is buried in the past should remain covered.

…………………………………………………………………there is no turning back.

Memento Mori...

2006-03-17T00:06:00.000-05:00

Yes… We all will die eventually, and it is good to remember that simple fact. But have you ever noticed that when you are suffering from a really bad case of the flu that, unlike most other times when you are wishing death to stay away for many years to come, that instead, if you could manage to stand up to begin with, you would go and find Thanatos and throw yourself upon his Scythe???

Yeah, that’s about how I’m feeling right now… I’m sitting here in an over stuffed chair (Ok… Sitting isn’t quite correct… Maybe I should say I have simply collapsed here in the chair…) with my laptop, trying to focus on typing, just so I can stop thinking about how freaking miserable I am right now and just how good the eternal slumber sounds at the moment…

I can feel my veins, and the flu medication coursing through them, running up and around my head, down my neck, into and out of my heart, and on and on and on… My blood is pounding in my temples and my ears… I have to close one eye from time to time just to be able to clearly see the words that I am trying to type… And I’m starting to think that maybe, just maybe, it would have been better NOT to have taken the drugs to combat the flu symptoms to begin with because I don’t think the meds are really helping the flu symptoms, I think they are just making me more miserable.

OK… Now I’m relegated to closing both eyes while I type. It is good to be a true touch typist… (Thank you Mrs. Hammer!!!) I always like to mess with people when they come into my office and I’ll keep typing while I look them in the eye… I’ve been told that watching someone do that is unnerving… Why? I have no idea…

Anyway, I’m going to try to sleep this off… Happy St. Patrick’s day to everyone who bothers to observe this holiday… Enjoy…!

Decisions

2006-03-05T23:08:00.000-05:00

We all face them… Really can’t make it through a single day without making one… And, I’m in the business of making decisions. I do it all the time, and where I like to think things out and review all the data I can before making a decision, I’m also usually accurate at making good decisions on the fly. But the one area where I seem unable to make good decisions is in my own personal relationships.

I have a major decision to make at the moment… Go back, or get out. There is a lot of data on this I have to work with from the past. And, I have some much different data to work with based on very recent conversations. I have no doubt of the sincerity of both parties concerned at this point, but that doesn’t mean anything will change for the positive.

Well… I have a little time left to mull things over before making a final commitment to what path I will select. I just keep thinking about an old Patty Smyth song, ‘Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough.’

Decisions… Unconscious… Decisions… Unconscious… Hummm… I do have that bottle of Bombay Blue…

Superbia, Invidia, Ira, Avaritia, Tristia, Gula, Luxuria

2006-03-04T00:48:00.000-05:00

Four over fourteen hundred years mankind has been aware of seven sins which by some religious doctrines consider are considered to be deadly. Superbia – Pride; Invidia – Envy; Ira – Anger; Avaritia – Avarice; Tristia – Sadness (yes, replaced by sloth, but I understand sadness better than slothfulness); Gula – Gluttony; Luxuria - Lust.

The whole intent of presenting this information was to inform the devout of that which could place their position in the afterlife in question. If you know about a thing, you can account for a thing. You have a choice.

I wonder how often people might stop to think about what they actually do in their day to day lives that might fall under the category of a deadly sin. And, when you do start thinking hard about the issue, what kind of a list can you generate going back over time.

These are nothing more than states of emotion, and as often will happen emotions tend to feed off of each other. We are all emotional beings and we all at some time must experience one or more of these emotional states. But do we really consider them to have potential everlasting consequences, or has society gotten to a state where these “sins” are nothing more than business as usual?

I have pride in my accomplishments; I envy those with a relationship like the one I would like; I find anger at many things in the world; I have a lot of sadness for a variety of reasons; And what can I say about lust… It occurs in many forms and fashion.

It’s something to think about from time to time… How it all fits into my life at the moment, or what I consider being right or wrong, I’m not sure… But every once in awhile when I’m staring at the stars at night, just thinking…

Tempus Fugit

2006-03-03T06:10:00.000-05:00

Time flees… It has been pointed out to me that it has been quite some time since I have added to my mad missives. I can assure all that this lapse has not been due to my lack of interest in sharing my thoughts, nor have I found myself with a lack of materials. My mind, as always, has been quite active. I find the true reason to be that simply of a lack of spirit over the past several weeks.

Many around the world look forward to the New Year. Celebrations abound, moods are festive and excited, and scores of new resolutions are drafted with the best of intentions. However, as I entered into the New Year, I found myself dealing with issues that are impacting me on many levels of my existence and as such, I simply have retreated somewhat into the depths of my own reality in order to understand and cope with eddies of life.

I was taught once in a creative writing class that there are four primary Conflicts in any good story:

Man against man
Man against nature
Man against society
Man against himself

And, along with a satisfying Conflict, there must be a good plot with Events that move the story through to the conclusion. There are a plethora of stories held in high esteem dealing with only one set of Conflicts. But what about times when two or more Conflicts are being addressed by the same character at the same time? Well, so the story of my life goes…

I started out the story of my New Year with three basic conflicts: Myself against (wo)man, Myself against nature, and Myself against society. (I will use the term Society at this point with regards to one of the conflicts as it seems to be the best fit.)

Man against (wo)man - The end of 2005 was seeing a steady decline in my relationship with my current, um, significant other. For some time, really, she and I have been at odds on many levels. But from around Christmas through the end of the year (and even more so to present) there was a rapid decline in our abilities to tolerate one another. During a time that should have been joyful, there was much darkness and sorrow, and it totally overshadowed the Spirit of the Season, let alone my own Spirit. Events such as this have the tendency to drain the mind and body of energy, leaving one to stumble through the mundane daily tasks with the clarity and alacrity of someone on Thorazine. Even when all else is right in the world, a troubled relationship can take its toll on anyone in short order. As I indicated, this has only deteriorated over the past couple of months to the point where I now have a place to stay only due to the charity and kindness (which is very much appreciated) of an old friend.

Man against nature – Maybe some would argue that medical problems might be man against himself. I guess there might be times where this could be true, say, in an instance where a mental condition existed. (Hummmmmmmm…. Ok, another possible conflict for me to contemplate….) However, I am electing to consider my present medical condition as myself against a natural illness. One that started late last year, arrived unexpectedly, and one that may still require surgery to correct. At present, it is at a wait and see what happens next point before they want to go in and start cutting out things. But, there is only so much that can be removed in ones body before there starts to exist a notable impact on the quality and condition of life. Wait and see… Nice… Oh, $3600 for you to tell me that? Ok… Thanks… Great doing business with you…

Man against society – The first day back to the office after the New Year holiday was when I found that my job might be in jeopardy due to evolutions within my company. No one has the desire to be unemployed (by a decision other than their own), especially once a salary level has reached a point where you can not reasonably expect to find other gainful employment at the same level without searching for quite some time. Of course, finding out something like this right after the holidays AND while dealing with another stressful conflict might just make Carrie Nation drain the private stores of the Jack Daniel’s Distillery. Needless to say, at this point, I’m starting to feel just a little bit on the cynical side of life.

I think I may be well on the way to starting yet another conflict as I wage the war in my mind over how to deal with these issues. At least for now, the job issue seems to be good, but it is still quite stressful. Having to deal with the eminent collapse of my relationship is adding just more than a little stress on me, and there are always other little things running around in the background to stir things up just for grins.

The Chinese proverb says, “May you live in interesting times…” Hey, I wouldn’t mind some uninteresting times for a little while. I’m tired… I would appreciate a break in things… Maybe a little bit of “luck”, even though I personally don’t subscribe to the notion of “luck.” Maybe a fifth of Beam Black would lighten the mood… I don’t know right now. All I know is that I intend to keep going, one day at a time, see what happens, make the most of things the best that I can. Carpe diem!!! Naw… Carpe noctis!!!!

All the while, I’m going to have a really cool tune running through my head with lyrics that pretty much sum up how I’m feeling at the moment:

You see me now, a veteran
Of a thousand psychic wars
I've been living on the edge so long
Where the winds of limbo roar
And I'm young enough to look at
And far too old to see
All the scars are on the inside
I'm not sure that there's anything left of me

{Refrain}
Don't let these shakes go on
It's time we had a break from it
It's time we had some leave
We've been living in the flames
We've been eating out our brains
Oh, please don't let these shakes go on

You ask me why I'm weary
Why I can't speak to you
You blame me for my silence
Say it's time I changed and grew
But the war's still going on, dear
And there's no end that I know
And I can't say if we're ever
I can't say if we're ever gonna be free

{Refrain}

You see me now a veteran
Of a thousand psychic wars
My energy is spent at last
And my armor is destroyed
I have used up all my weapons
And I'm helpless and bereaved
Wounds are all I'm made of
Did I hear you say that this is victory

{As Refrain}
Don't let these shakes go on
It's time we had a break from it
Send me to the rear
Where the tides of madness swell
And been sliding into hell
Oh, please don't let shakes go on
Don't let these shakes go on
Don't let these shakes go on

Turn The Page…

2005-12-30T12:05:00.000-05:00

“Every day we're standing in a time capsule
Racing down a river from the past
Every day we're standing in a wind tunnel
Facing down the future coming fast”

- Rush

Another year come and almost gone… Didn’t we just mark our entry into the 2000’s last year? What? That was SIX years ago almost… Where have the years gone? It’s been how long since I was there? …that I did that? …that I saw them? I’m getting old…

It seems like almost yesterday when I was looking forward to getting out of high school… Carefree days visiting with friends, staying up all night, walking around town, playing tag all over large bales of hay, playing AD&D through an entire weekend, racing along back country roads… Where has life gone? What have I to show for all the years so far? What will I have to show in the future?

The past is now so clear, the present is starting to fade, and the future is obscured… What is coming towards me down the river of time?

To all… Happy New Year! May your future be bright…

At What Price, Immortality…?

2005-12-19T18:30:00.000-05:00

For as long as I can remember, I have liked History. So much, in fact, that I at one time entertained the thoughts of getting a degree in History and either working for the Library of Congress, or finding a nice, quiet, conservative college campus somewhere in the mountains (I would prefer the Rocky Mountains) to teach History.

I started college working on three majors: Information Technologies (as I also love computers), History, and Political Science. Needless to say after the first two semesters, I came to a cross road of decision; stop killing myself with credit overload, save money, graduate sooner, and go for something that will make me money OR focus on something I had a true passion for, that wouldn’t make me a lot of money, but that I could immerse myself in gladly for the rest of my life…or until dementia sets in, whichever comes first. Needless to say, I choose the money… [Break to listen to B.O.C. on the Internet radio.]

So, here I am few lustrums later working in I.T. It’s been good to me, but I still dream of history… Which brings me to my point…

I have always been drawn to stories of immortality, or time travel, or being something with a much, much longer life span than what is normal for the human race. This explains why I enjoy stories by Poul Anderson, H. G. Wells, and Roger Zelazny.

Time travel (H. G. Wells) would at least offer me the opportunity to see history like no one else has, but for a finite time. Likewise, a much longer life span (Roger Zelazny) like an Amberite would allow me not only to see history, but to create and recreate it by traversing to different shadows of reality. But again, for a finite time. Immortality however, (Poul Anderson) as found in “The Boat Of A Million Years” could be the most fascinating option. These people were immortal and could live thousands and thousands of years. However, the immortality came with a twist… These people could be killed if hurt badly enough. Were they lucky enough, however, life went on and on and on…

But what if I had the opportunity to become immortal, and very difficult to kill… In fact, what if I had to kill to survive, to maintain my immortality… Yeah… Good old vampire type immortality…

Either way, after a few hundred years, or a few thousand years, of existence, what would I be? Would my memories fade over time even as they do as we live our 70, 80, 90 years as human mortals? Would I still find things in the world that were new and exciting? People? Philosophies? What place would I have in the world? Would I still be human? Would I still be sane? Would I still feel for others? Love them? Care about them? After all of the loss, the separation over time, would I still care to have relationships? Would my knowledge and experiences of all the centuries be truly useful? Would I still be young, or would I feel extremely old, tired, and useless?

What price would I pay eventually for immortality? Or what price might the world pay for my existence?

Life Sucks. Get A Helmet, Okay?

2005-12-16T18:57:00.000-05:00

Well... If any of you have ever listened to older Denis Leary stuff, then you know that isn't quite how the line goes, but it will suffice.

I could use a helmet today… A really, really big one… Bigger than the one Dark Helmet wore in Spaceballs… In fact, I’m not sure anyone really makes a helmet as big as the one I would like to have had on today, because basically boys and girls… Life sucks! At least it does today.

This is all work related. And I like my job, don’t get me wrong. It’s a good environment, with good people, with a good salary, and good benefits. But, as a manager, there are times when I really hate my job. Most of those times have to do with having to manage people. Today is a primary example of a bad people management day…

I had to fire someone on my staff today… Nine days before freaking Christmas, and I have to tell this person that, Hey, Merry Christmas… You’re fired!!! Happy Holidays!! Enjoy the start of the New Year in the unemployment line!!!!

Was the termination justified? Yeah… But right before Christmas? I had to do it, I know I did, and it wasn’t my fault this person did the things they did to warrant termination… But right before Christmas??? {FYI… I wanted to at least wait until January… Wasn’t an option left open to me…}

SO… I get to tell someone that just bought a new house a few months ago and is trying to get on with life that not only do you have no money for Christmas gifts, but you have no money now for the house payment, or the car payment, or food, or electricity, or gas, or…or…or… SIGH…………..

I have an obligation to my company to do the right thing… I have no problem with that… I would fire my own mother if I had a business reason to do so… BUT NOT RIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS!!!!

Oh well… Life sucks, get a helmet!

Insomnia Is An Art Form...

2005-12-12T03:42:00.000-05:00

I want to sleep… I have to get up in three hours… I worked 11 hours yesterday… I’ve worked many more over the past two weeks getting ready to move the office from one location to the other. I’m already tired from all of that, and now, I can’t sleep. I went to bed five hours ago, but sleep has not come… Anyone have a really big hammer???

I guess it could also be that I’m going to the hospital tomorrow for tests. This will be the second time as the first time they were unable to complete the tests to the point of having any useful information. I’ve already been told that most likely what they fine is going to require surgery. This will only confirm the suspicions. I’m not looking forward to this, and given my already tired frame of mind and body, I think this is why I am unable to slumber tonight.

This really isn’t true insomnia… I’ve suffered that before, many years ago. Contrary to popular beliefs, sleep depravation will not cause you to go insane…assuming you were already insane to begin with, which I think maybe back then I might have qualified for the term. Who knows…

Well… I know I won’t sleep while typing on a computer, so I guess maybe I should stop and try to rest. But it is so convenient still being in bed with a wireless laptop.

Of Winter, A Wolf, And Twilight...

2005-12-11T15:10:00.000-05:00

I imagine myself as Elric of Melnibone… I have been called by Man the White Wolf, and many other names… I was in the Northern Wastes when an omen showed itself to me and beckoned me to follow… It was a white wolf… I have followed on impulse, starting a journey through a frozen land ensconced within eternal twilight…

I follow the white wolf not knowing where I am going or why… I have no companions; I have no friends to accompany me… Only Stormbringer at my side, now howling for souls, but there are none to feed the demon, and as such, my strength dwindles, my life ebbs, and I know it is not long before I will perish in this hellish place, alone, cold, and as empty as the land through which I journey. But I must follow where the white wolf leads as I am drifting through the multiverse and must find myself back to sanity, or that at least which I call sanity. Without a guide, I am also lost. As it would seem, I am doomed.

Where are you Arioch!? Donblas!? Xiombarg!? Won’t one of you show yourself to feed my sword? Come for me!!! I await you!!!

But nothing… Just the cold… Just the emptiness… Just the white wolf leading me onward…

A Day That Will Live In Infamy…

2005-12-07T13:30:00.000-05:00

December 7, 1941… A little before 8:00 a.m. (Oahu, Hawaii time), about 180 planes launched from Japanese carriers attacked the American Pacific fleet stationed at Pearl Harbor without warning. The attack, carried out in two waves, cost the lives of about 2400 Americans, 1177 of them alone lost when the USS Arizona exploded and sank. A little over twenty ships were damaged; all but three were eventually returned to service. More than 300 of our aircraft were lost or destroyed. It was a stunning victory for a country to achieve over the United States given how far away Japan was and how poor they were in resources. It was also a costly mistake by Japan as it galvanized America in a way they never expected and brought a unified, resource rich and technologically sound country into World War II.

Why should we remember this attack every year? If for no other reason it would be due to the historical significance of the date in American history… Or to remember yet another sacrifice made for this country by our military personnel… Or to remind us that there are those in the world still today that seek to bring harm through violence to our country and are prepared to do so without warning… Does 9/11 ring a bell?

It was Thomas Jefferson who said, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” It was true then, it is still true today.

Blog Chain Letters...

2005-12-07T12:57:00.000-05:00

Ok... Thanks to "another random slacker" I had to take the time to actually dredge up memories from the past to complete this little The Five Things MEME. [Side Note to ars: May Arioch taste your soul sooner than later...] Anyway, here goes...

10 YEARS AGO

I was suffering from severe clinical depression… My marriage had failed in divorce earlier in the year… My Ex and her new husband had fallen out of site (against court orders) and I was heading into the Christmas season not knowing where my daughter was, how she was doing, or anything… I was trying to scrape enough money together to get a lawyer to take a contempt case back into court… I had buried my father in late September… And so far in the year, 12 other members of my family had died… I was having thoughts about reenacting one particular scene out of “It’s A Wonderful Life.”

5 YEARS AGO

I was working in an I.T. position for a globally known electronics manufacture. The money was good, the job was good, and I was trying to find a polite way to decline the attentions of someone who wanted to adopt my last name as her own. I had a nice little apartment with a fireplace and a balcony. I was starting to enjoy life somewhat. I was looking forward to the time off (16 paid days at the end of December) from my job during which I was going home for a family Christmas dinner and to visit some old friends.

1 YEAR AGO

My son turned two towards the end of the month. I was a few months into a new I.T. position and was really enjoying the job and the company. Overall life was going along pretty good.

5 YUMMY THINGS

Chili, Mr. Bobe’s Pizza, my Mom’s vegetable soup, Cherry pie, a good cup of coffee.

5 SONGS I KNOW BY HEART

“Black Blade” & “Veteran Of The Psychic Wars” (Blue Oyster Cult), “It’s Been Awhile” (Staind), “How You Remind Me” (Nickelback), “Another One Rides The Bus” (Weird Al Yankovic

5 THINGS I WOULD DO WITH A LOT OF MONEY

Play in one high stakes poker game in Vegas, Take care of family and friends, Pay off all debts, Start my own bookstore, Giggle when looking at my bank balance.

5 THINGS I WOULD NEVER WEAR

Spandex, Anything advertising any product, A plaid suit, A tutu, Underwear that didn’t come out of the package.

5 FAVORITE TV SHOWS (CURRENT)

Smallville, Charmed, Reba, Supernatural, Blue Color TV

5 FAVORITE TV SHOWS (LEGACY)

Star Trek, Space:1999, Magnum P.I., Hill Street Blues, The Six Million Dollar Man

5 FAVORITE TOYS

Um……….

5 PEOPLE WHO GET THIS MEME

I think this segment of the chain breaks here…

Agents of Fortune…

2005-12-01T14:36:00.000-05:00

A happy 61st birthday to Eric Bloom of Blue Öyster Cult fame… The last opportunity I had to see B.O.C. was a year ago last September. All I can say is, they still ROCK! If I’m doing that well when I get to be their age I will consider myself lucky. Maybe there is something to be said for sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll.

I have been a fan of B.O.C. for a long time now. A good friend of mine who also enjoys the writings of Michael Moorcock introduced me to their music when he found out that Moorcock had worked with Bloom in writing some lyrics for a few songs that B.O.C. performed. I first listened to those songs, then the rest of the album, and was hooked.

One of the best of their concerts I have seen was in Denver back in the early 90’s. It was a small venue, I was spitting distance from the stage, and they rocked the house for 2 ½ hours… Went off stage for about 20 minutes, and came back out and gave us 45 minutes more… I didn’t hear right for the next four days, but what an experience.

It’s hard to think of these guys getting to be that age, but then again, I have to look at how old I’m getting and how long I’ve been listening to their music… All of the sudden it’s hard to think of ME getting that old!! Oh well… Just wait until I’m about 95, in the nursing home, confined to a wheelchair, jamming to B.O.C. and yelling at a young nurse about my sponge bath!!!! I can hardly wait!!!

If you'd like to know more about B.O.C., click here and ENJOY!

Star Wreck: In The Pirkinning

2005-11-23T15:48:00.000-05:00

Short post... First, I hope all of you have a very Happy Thanksgiving!

Second, if you are a fan of Star Trek and/or Babylon 5 as I am, you must check out www.starwreck.com when you have 1h 43m 31s to kill.

I usually am not to keen on fan related works, but this is a rare exception! Enjoy!!

Up In Smoke... That's Where My Money Goes...

2005-11-17T11:23:00.000-05:00

But at least it isn’t illegal smoke… It’s just the normal cigarette smoke of Marlboro Ultra Lights…

Today is the day of the 29th Great American Smokeout. A day for people, like me, all over the country to stop smoking for at least 24 hours, and preferably for the rest of our lives. It’s a good idea. Let’s face it, smoking kills… It’s expensive… $4.54 for one pack of cigarettes over in Ohio I found out the other day when I was there… Let’s see, if I lived in Ohio, and I only buy by the pack (…which wastes even more money vs. by the carton), and I smoke about one pack per day… $1616.24 at least per year. That sounds ludicrous doesn’t it? Spending that much money to more than likely cause my own untimely demise?

I mentioned before that my Dad died ten years ago. The cause? Respiratory Failure… A nice euphuism for saying he died of emphysema brought about by smoking for more than fifty years, and when I say smoking, I mean chain smoking three or more packs a day. The last week of his life, he was on a respirator. The tube was down his throat so he couldn’t talk. A few days after I got back home they tried to remove him from the respirator and told him that if they couldn’t get him off of it, most likely he would never be able to breath on his own again. He managed to stay off for about ten minutes. He sat there on the side of the bed in the ICU ward, bent over, gasping for life. Needless to say, he wasn’t in a talkative mood or condition. They were starting to put the tube back into his mouth when he put his hand up to block it, he looked at me, and said “…I love you son.” Then he pointed to my shirt pocket where my cigarettes were and said, “…Get off those things while you still can.” Those were the last words my Dad ever said to anyone. He died two days later…

Well, needless to say, I still smoke. I still enjoy lighting up when having a good conversation and some coffee, or when I’m sitting at a Denny’s at night having coffee and reading a book, or when I need to think, or when I’m stressed… Even knowing what it is doing to my health, I like it. It is a strange relationship I have with my cigarettes.

The simple fact is, I need to quit. I would like for my kids to have me around longer than their 20’s or 30’s. I don’t want to harm their health, so I don’t smoke in the house, I don’t smoke in the car, I don’t set us all in the smoking section when I go out. I remember how it used to be when I was a kid… Dad smoked in the house, the car, everywhere. Of course, you could still wander down the isles of our local IGA shopping for groceries while smoking. Everywhere you went… Movies, the hardware store, THE HOSPITAL, the workplace… Smoking… How times change.

So today, I’ll smoke a few extra cigarettes just because it is the Great American Smokeout… But soon… I need to quit… I want to quit… I will quit… I just hope I do it on my own terms and not because Thanatos is there to tell me I’m quitting…

[Do you want information on how to quit smoking??? Click here....]

Let’s Go Fly A Kite…

2005-11-12T16:51:00.000-05:00

[Music On] …Up to the highest height / Let’s go fly a kite / And send it soaring / Up through the atmosphere / Up where the air is clear / Oh, let’s go fly a kite! [/Music Off]

There was a time in my childhood that I really enjoyed flying kites. I didn’t have a favorite type, color, or style of kite, I just wanted to tie some string to something, throw it in the air, and watch it go…

I do remember about the time I stopped flying kites… It was the spring of ’78 and everyone was excited since we had just come through the, now infamous, Blizzard of ’78. It was warmer, it was getting green, the sky was blue, the clouds light & white & fluffy, and there was wind. Good time to fly kites!

I got a balsa wood box kite kit, spent a bit of time gluing everything together and getting it all ready, got my string, and away I went. It took a little effort to get it up in the air, but once it started to go it was great. I must have had it out on about 800’ of string and was just standing there in the lot, watching my kite, peaceful and content…when a strong gust of wind hit the kite, the string broke, and…well, yeah, down went the kite.

The problem with where I lived and kite flying was the woods, tree lines, ditches, and fields. The wind had blown the kite over the woods back behind the house, and since the string had broke, all I could do was guess as to where the thing might have gone down at and go try to find it. I searched the rest of that day and the next, didn’t find the kite. So, I gave up on it. Talk about feeling like Charlie Brown… All I needed was for my girl friend (as in, she was a friend and female) next door to come along with a football.

Anyway, to continue, towards the end of the year, maybe December, I was back in the woods doing something and as I was walking along towards the north edge of the woods I happened to look up at this really big and tall tree; up in the very top, on the south side of the tree, hung the skeleton of my box kite. I think if the thing had been about four or five feet higher in the air it would have cleared that tree and come down in a field. Needless to say, I left my kite there in the now hallowed branches of that tree and that is about the last time I remembered flying a kite.

That is until last year when I was taking a camping vacation along Lake Michigan. We happened to have some kites there and I started flying on again there on the beach. I was once again amazed to find how peaceful and relaxed I became standing there holding onto the end of a piece of string while watching this cheap piece of plastic toy flying overhead.

Why am I talking about all of this? Well, I’ve been stuck at the office all day today and I walked outside a little while ago to have a smoke. It’s sunny, the temperature is nice, there are a few clouds in the sky, and there is wind. I’m stressed… I’m not happy about working on a weekend… I have a lot of things on my mind at the moment… But for a minute, I stood there, looking up into the sky… And remembered… All of the sudden, I had this urge to head to a hobby store, find a balsa wood box kite, some string, and fly my way into bliss… Come on, everyone!!! Let’s go fly a kite!

The Eleventh Month, The Eleventh Day, The Eleventh Hour…

2005-11-11T13:19:00.000-05:00

The year is 1918… After more than four years of fighting, papers are finally signed in France by Germany bringing and end to the conflict. Armies started to withdraw from their positions, and a world weary of conflict gave a sigh of relief. Hugs, kisses, laughter, and cheer were present most everywhere… The “War to End All Wars” the “Great War” was over.

Of course, anyone who has studied history knows that this “Great War” did not provide an end to all wars. It ended up being called World War I because a scant twenty years later (as W.W. I officially ended in 1919) World War II broke out with the German invasion of Poland. Once again, the world was thrown into chaos.

Originally, November 11 was called Armistices Day starting in 1938. It was designated as a day to pay respect to our military who served during World War I. However, once our country had come through World War II, some started thinking that maybe we should have a special day to honor our veteran’s from all wars. Changes were made, and ever since 1954, we call November 11 Veteran’s Day.

I have always had a special appreciation for Veteran’s Day going back about as far as I can remember. For one thing, my father was a combat veteran (European and Pacific theaters) of World War II and taught me from an early age the concepts of honor, duty, and patriotism. He would tell me about the war, about his three brothers who also enlisted, but thankfully, never saw combat, along with the reasons why the now called “greatest generation” fought in World War II. For another, Veteran’s Day was the day before my father’s birthday. (He would turn 83 tomorrow were he still alive. Happy Birthday Dad… I love you and miss you…)

Aside from my fascination with World War II, which led to the study of other American wars and history in general, my father also regaled me with the tales of my Grandfather who was an infantry soldier during World War I. Let me digress for a moment…

World War I actually started in 1914. It was a European conflict and at the time, the United States was still for the most part practicing isolationism. So, even though some wanted to enter the fray early, the government stayed out of it. But a few events over the next couple of years changed the American viewpoint. Two primary causes were the sinking of the R.M.S. Lusitania, a British passenger ship, by the Germans in 1915 killing over 100 Americans and the Zimmermann letter (early 1917) sent by Germany to Mexico trying to entice Mexico to attack the United States and reclaim territory lost by Mexico to the U.S. during the middle 1800’s.) Finally, America had enough and declared war on Germany in April of 1917. However, the bulk of our military forces, under the command of Gen. John Pershing, didn’t enter into Europe until the summer months of 1918.

Of the roughly 2,000,000 U.S. military sent to fight in W.W. I, over 115,000 never made it back… And over 200,000 were wounded… World War I saw the end of warfare that was restricted mostly to armies… It saw the end of a code of conduct and chivalry that had been observed for centuries… For the first time, it saw massive civilian casualties, but nothing like in World War II where almost 50% of the dead were civilians. It saw new weapons of destruction; Tanks, submarines, chemical warfare, and airplanes.

This brings me back to my Grandfather… Back home in Illinois, his family was contacted by the War Department informing the family of his death somewhere in France. They were uncertain as to the final disposition of the body due to the war time conditions. They held his funeral; the government presented a flag… But what no one knew at the time was that he actually was not dead. He had suffered a very serious gun shot wound in his abdomen. He was found laying on a battlefield, bleeding, suffering, dying, by a local French family. They took my Grandfather and for the next few months they tended to his wounds, they fed him, they sheltered him, and they hid him from the German patrols. Eventually, my Grandfather was able to travel and they helped him get across enemy territory and back to the American army and, eventually, home.

My Grandfather died before I was born. My Father did not recall the name of the family, but he remembered his dad telling that as he spoke no French and they spoke no English, there was no real communication during his ordeal. Somewhere, in France, I figure that a grandchild or a great-grandchild knows this story from the other side. To you I say, “Thank you…” To the French government (and some other French people) I say, “…It’s still not too late for you to be speaking German!”

It is Veteran’s Day… I’m sure you know a veteran… Thank them for their service, their sacrifice. Regardless of what you think about war and conflict, please remember that our military men and women have kept this a free nation since the American Revolution. I doubt if any of our honored dead went to war with the intention of dying for their country, but we, as a country, have lost millions in conflict.

I will leave you with this to think about… During World War I, on Christmas Eve in 1914, many soldiers from both sides stopped shooting at each other and started to celebrate Christmas. The armies were close enough to each other at some points along the line that they could hear each other singing. After awhile, some soldiers from both sides left their trenches to meet in the middle to exchange gifts and celebrate. There is even official record of a game of football (soccer I think) being held between the foes. This lasted through Christmas (in some parts, through the New Year) and then the shooting began again.

Conflict happens… It always has, and I personally think it always will… But there are moments when differences can be sat aside and mutual respect for one another can thrive. This could be but for a few hours, or a few days, or week, or even years. The longer, the better…

Dad, Granddad, Great-Great-Granddad (Civil War) - thank you for what you did for your country. I remember… And I hope all of you who may read this will remember as well… Happy Veteran’s Day!

All I Ever Needed To Know In Life I Learned From Playing Dungeon’s and Dragon’s

2005-11-08T15:34:00.000-05:00

I always like coming across stories from people claiming that Dungeon’s and Dragon’s ruined their life, or made them evil, or drove them away from God, or enticed them into having unhealthy fantasies about their teachers, pastors, person next door…whatever. The general claim by many is that Dungeon’s and Dragon’s is intrinsically evil and should be avoided at all costs. Well, to quote a famous phrase from one Col. Sherman T. Potter, “Horse Hockey!!!” (If you watched M*A*S*H, you’ll understand…)

People, let’s face it… You would be hard pressed to come up with much on this planet that is designed to be evil. For example, take an iron skillet. You can feed your family by using this device and a little bit of Crisco. Or, you can knock someone senseless… (Marion showed you how in “Raiders of the Lost Ark!”) You can use a truck to haul firewood to your home to heat your house in the winter, or, you can go run someone down in a fit of rage because you missed your favorite episode of American Dad! Popcorn… How evil is popcorn?!?!? Well, ask the family of someone who choked to death while eating popcorn at the Saturday Afternoon matinee and maybe they will think it was evil… Um… Mathematics!!! Nothing wrong with that, right?? Well, look at John Nash and maybe you might think differently… Or nuclear scientists who used math to create atomics…? The simple point is, people can take pretty much anything and use it in some very wrong ways. The Bible, The Koran, The Book of Mormon… Ill used by many all over the world, but that is another long topic. For those people out there who think that Dungeon’s and Dragon’s ruined their life, I would have to question if you ever really had one to begin with, but that is just my not so humble opinion.

I will tell you now that Dungeon’s and Dragon’s made me the individual I am today, and for the most part, I like who I am. This game challenged my ability to think, to be creative, and to explore situations and topics that I would have never been able to explore in “the real world.” [Disclaimer: The events listed below contain adult themes and situations, or out right felonious acts of violence and debauchery. Reader’s beware…]

I lived and learned vicariously through my characters that: Unprotected sex can cause you serious harm, some of it so serious you may need a limited wish spell to cure the malady; Drinking and driving, uh, er, riding can cause serious bodily harm and/or an untimely death…your own or the person you happen to run down…which can still lead to your own death when the whole village comes after you for killing one of their own and hangs you in a tree; Drugs… The most common experience with drugs is that YOU DIE! You either get stupid and get killed, get some bad drugs and die, someone kills you for your drugs, you get killed trying to get drugs, or you get drugs and get stupid and start drinking and then it all goes down hill from there; A lack of education doesn’t get you far in life; When you go and cut the head off of the big bad ugly dude that has been raping goats, killing local farmers, and insulting their women.....his bigger, badder, uglier brothers might come and kill off your entire family to get back at you; Being mean to other people only lasts for so long before they get enough of it and hit you over the head when you aren’t looking; That power is GREAT…right up to the moment you are killed because you have too much power; That a pissed off wife that you have cheated on in AD&D can make Lorena Bobbit look like an amateur; That money will NOT buy everything in the world and usually what it will buy isn’t what is going to really make you happy in the long run; That you can NOT handle every adventure without the help of your party; That for every choice you make, there is a consequence…sometimes a bad one for a good choice, sometimes a good one for a bad choice, but usually, good=good and bad=bad and don’t forget that just because you personally are not impacted by a choice that the others around you won’t get blasted…

Maybe the greatest lesson I ever learned while playing Dungeon’s and Dragon’s is that camaraderie is a wonderful blessing not only inside of the game, but outside in the real world. I was introduced to some wonderful people a long, long time ago drawn together by a fascination about this new game called Dungeon’s and Dragon’s… We came from different walks of life; there was a scholar, a cheerleader, a musician, a “Joe Schmoe”, a geek, a couple of other odds and ends, and a football player/honor roll student/should have applied himself much harder/computer loving/didn’t fit into anywhere type dude. Under most circumstances, the type of people that usually wouldn’t have ever gotten together, much less became friends. But thanks to this wonderful game, we did. And to this day, the friendships endure.

Even to this day, when we have the rare chance to get together, we all fondly remember the days of old, the dim lighting in the basement, the rattle of the dice, and all of the wonderful countries and worlds we “grew up” together in while learning a lot of important life lessons in the safety of a pencil, some paper, and our imaginations.

I am an only child in the fact that my sister died in infancy many years before I was born. But when playing with my friends, I had several brothers and sisters at my side. And in the real world, I come to count one of my old companions as a true brother and I will cherish our relationship for the rest of my life. Does any of this sound evil? Naw... Didn't think so... Maybe that has something to do with PERSPECTIVE... Oh well... Just my two cents worth...

In Robert Jordan’s “Wheel of Time” series, there is one saying that always conjures up great memories for me: ‘Dovie’andi se tovya sagain…’ ‘Time to roll the dice.’ Now where did I put my dice bag???

Two Tin Cans, And Some String...

2005-11-07T14:08:00.000-05:00

Not that I have seen any children actually doing this for a long time, I remember back in the day when we used to get bored in the summer and try a number of things just to see if they would work or not. The good thing is, I don’t believe we ever totally destroyed anything, including ourselves, in the process. A variety of things we tried simply didn’t work the way we thought… Like trying to jump off the porch roof while holding onto two kites to see how far we could glide… You know, that kind of stuff…

I do remember one little experiment we tried that actually was some what impressive. We heard that if you took two tin cans, put a little hole in the bottom of each one, and tied the two cans together with some string, that you could talk back and forth like the telephone. Well, needless to say, Ma Bell was never threatened by our “breakthroughs…” But the cool thing about it (to us at the time anyway) was that it really worked. More or less… Of course, we quickly switched to more hi-tech stuff like walkie-talkies and CB radios!

Now jump ahead thirty plus years… We now can do without the string because our tin cans are able to talk to each other without wires. Between my cell phone and my wireless laptop, it is amazing what I can accomplish. (Ok… So a lot of the time I want to flush the cell phone and throw the laptop out the window…) But none the less, it is cool to be able to sit by the ocean, watching the waves role up and down the beach, have a beer in hand, and be talking to someone two thousand miles away stuck in their office. Or my personal favorite, sit outside in my porch swing while connecting back to my office getting some work done. Or, at times using a wireless internet card, turn a park into my office for the day.

I never realized how much I relay on wireless communications until I went on a vacation, a real vacation, last year. I went camping for almost two weeks at a county park along Lake Michigan. I was about 1 ½ mile outside the range of all the cell towers. No internet… No phone… Left the pager at home… I really suffered the first week. It was like I needed technological de-tox. But that second week was pure bliss…

Well, talk about something too long and it’s bound to catch up to you… I need to answer my cell phone… I wonder what would happen if I pulled out the battery and tied a piece of string to the phone…??? Happy communicating…

Ah, That Java Jive...

2005-11-04T10:09:00.000-05:00

And no, I am not referring to that insidious little program delivered by the Sun corporation that seems to blast several other applications that make use of java every time they release an update.

No, I’m talking about that wonderful consumable that has ancient origins from the area of Ethiopia… That wonderful drink that at one time the Catholic church called “…a hellish brew…” The one and only Coffee!

There are not many things that I really find myself craving, but coffee is an exception. Coffee is what really most satisfies me when I need to wake up, when I need to think, when I need to relax, when I need something to make me feel normal. Without coffee, what’s the point…?

A few years ago, my doctor asked me during one of my visits if I drank coffee. I assured him I was a major coffee lover. He then proceeded to ask me how many cups I usually drank per day. I looked him straight in the eye and said, “…Doc…I have no idea. I measure my intake based on pots. Do you know how many cups are in a pot???” Needless to say he just shook his head, jotted down a few notes in my chart, and handed me a prescription for elevated blood pressure! [NOTE: Job stress related elevations… I know the coffee has NOTHING to do with it!]

I have found, though, that coffee is not always an appropriate beverage to imbibe. For example, based upon personal experience, I do NOT drink coffee before leaving the house on my daily commute to work. There is something about heavy metro traffic, a bunch of idiots on the road, and me being hypersensitive because of all the coffee coursing through my veins that does not make for a good combination!!! Take this morning… I’m driving along about 70 mph with the rest of the traffic and all of the sudden everything comes to a 45 mph grinding slow down. The reason? Six city highway dump trucks… Three of them in the far right lane… Three of them in the middle lane… All of them driving at 45 mph… Left lane open with traffic doing 70 mph… Two lanes trying to merge to the left to get around the trucks… Not a good thing. Now imagine if I had been drinking coffee… My first inclination would have been to try and shove one of these 6 ton vehicles off the road using my economy car. The whole mass, momentum ratio thing was not in my favor. And in my more sedate state of mind I realized this… But if I had been on COFFEE…!!!! Rubbing is racing, right??!!??

Well, anyway, my cup is empty and I need to go infuse myself with more coffee. Have a cup on me while you’re at it!!!

My First Time...

2005-11-03T18:48:00.000-05:00

…he mused out loud to no one in particular while finishing the last drag on his cigarette.
“First time for what…?” asked the voice behind him.
Startled, he whirled, dropping the still smoldering cigarette to the ground to find… Nothing… No one… The street was empty… Only a few leaves blowing along in the gutter.
Squinting, his breath showing in the cold night air, he peered more closely down the street. Was something there?
“Um, excuse me, I don’t mean to be rude, but first time for what…?”
Again, the voice right behind him, once more making his heart leap as he spun to see… Nothing…

Well, duh!!! I mean, come on... When the voice talking to you is inside of your own head, what would you expect to see???

Have you ever had cause to contemplate all of the “first times” that have occurred in your life? I mean, you can be a few minutes old and already have an impressive count of “first times.”

But as one grows older, the number continues to rise… And eventually, one is hard pressed to really remember the plethora of events that qualify for being counted in the “first time” category…

The first time...

…I realized if I make a mess in my diaper it’s yucky!
…I took my first steps.
…I said my first words.
…I went to school.
…I rode a bike.
…I fell in love.
…I had my heart broke.
…I made it with the really cute girl from band.
…I found out I was going to be a parent.
…I drove a car.
...I left home.
...I got my first job.
...I lost a parent.

And the list could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and... Ok... You get the picture.

But this very day, November 3, 2005 is my first time I have ever posted in my very own blog! Come to think of it, it is also the very first time I have ever posted in ANY blog. That isn't to say I haven't read a few from time to time, and I've thought about posting before, but for some reason I just simply never did get around to it. Just like I have resisted the urge for quite some to actually have my own blog. But now... It's too late... I have past yet another "first time" milestone... Sniff...

So... What will I do now with my little blog? Engage in titillating conversation with anyone and everyone? Perhaps... Dazzle the masses with my charming, and witty discourse? Rectify the problems of the other denizens of this electronic forum? Perchance, could I even dare to enlighten the world with my profound comprehension of and Answer To Life, the Universe, and Everything!?!?!? Could I STOP having these delusions of grandeur...????

No... I think for the most part I will simply share some of my thoughts from time to time, and look forward to a different perspective from others than that which I am accustom.

Greetings to you all...